CHAELISA One-shots

Birthday Letters

***

Chaeyoung took a deep breath. It felt like she'd been holding it for minutes, hours, days, months and even years. She held her breath until she felt like she was about to burst; it was the only way she was going to say what she needed to say. The deep breath held seven years of friendship and love and she was about to exhale.

"I know that I said that I'd wait forever for you, Lisa," she whispered. Her voice couldn't come out any stronger. "But I can't do this anymore."

Dark eyes blinked in surprise.

"What?" She was hurt. Obviously, she was hurt. Hell, it was killing Chaeyoung to even form the words, but either way, she died a little every morning when she woke up to an empty bed.

"I let you hide us in high school, Lis," Chaeyoung continued, the tightness in her chest threatening to push the torrent of tears she knew was waiting to fall. "We're three months away from graduating college and I can't hide anymore. I…" her voice choked and she managed to swallow a sob. "I can't wait for you to accept yourself. If you don't do it now, you never will. And I can't be around you if you're going to pretend to be something you're not. I just… I can't watch you be two different people anymore."

She had to get out of there fast. The tears were about to fall and she couldn't let Lisa see how much she didn't want to break up, even though Lisa probably could see it clear as day. Chaeyoung had to be strong. Lisa Manoban was going to kill her slowly but surely if she didn't get out.

As she stood up and walked to Lisa's door, she wasn't sure what hurt more – walking away from the love of her life or watching Lisa let it happen.

....

Thank God she'd already got a job lined up. Sure, she still needed to graduate, but she'd gone for an interview over Christmas break at an awesome company and they'd called her a week later, asking her to come back to sign a contract.

If she didn't have that she'd probably be dropping out.

It'd been a slow and torturous week since she walked away from Lisa. She hadn't heard from her, hadn't seen her, and part of her was glad for it. But after seven years of seeing each other every day and spending practically every night together, Chaeyoung found herself with permanent heartache. She loved Lisa so much, but it just didn't feel like the raven-haired goddess felt the same way.

She'd told Chaeyoung that she loved her. She'd told her on many occasions and Chaeyoung had believed her. Honestly, she knew Lisa loved her. That was what hurt so much.

If you love someone, you fight for them, right? You do whatever you can to make sure that they came first and that they are happy. Right?

She'd done all that and more for Lisa, but it had seldom been reciprocated and Chaeyoung was so tired of putting in all the effort to their relationship – their secret relationship – when Lisa still did as she pleased. She didn't cheat or anything like that. Chaeyoung knew she would never. They'd been completely faithful to each other since their junior year of high school.

Five and a half years. That was a long time to be in a secret relationship with someone, no matter how much you loved them.

Lisa was so petrified of rejection by everyone else that she forgot to keep the one person who loved her so completely close. And that same rejection had come from the one person she'd probably least expected it to, but Chaeyoung didn't regret it. She couldn’t regret it. It hurt. Jesus, did it hurt, but she knew she'd done the right thing.

The pounding on her door didn't stop, no matter how deep Chaeyoung buried her head under her duvet.

"Park Chaeyoung! You'd better open this goddamn door before I call your mother!"