The Unusual Thoughts of November (On Hold)

Chapter Eight

:- C H A P T E R  E I G H T-:

Morning sunlight burns through my eyelids. Slowly, I pries open my eyes. Everything aches and my mouth is disgustingly dry. Leo sits in an armchair with his head tipped backwards, eyes closed and brows furrowed. Here I am, right back where I started. The sheets constrict me so I kick them off and rip the various wires from my arms. I can't stay here. Not in this hospital. I try to stand up but my legs buckle beneath me. Trying again, I steady myself on the wall and stand. I begin to shiver so I take one of the blankets and pull it around myself. I go down the endless flights of stairs; dragging my feet behind me. Room 316. I still remember the number. The window had a view of the car park, Mum used to make jokes about that. They weren't funny.

It was so unfair. She'd been fine. Smiling, laughing and even telling us off.

"Two more scans and she'll be good to go." Leo and I clung to the doctor's words, waiting for the two scans that never got to happen. We visited her all of the three days she was in there. Three days.

"I'm thirsty," I stated.

"Leo, go and get me and your sister a drink," my mother smiled.

"What? Why can't November go and get it herself?" Leo whined.

"Because I said so," Mum raised her eyebrows indicating for Leo to go and wonder the hospital in search of the cafeteria.

"Fine."

He hadn't been gone too long but it was long enough. Suddenly, she began convulsing on the bed as if she were being electrocuted. Her mouth foamed and blood began to trickle from her nose and ears. She threw up all over herself and then she was still. All the while I was screaming. Nurses came running and pulled me out of room 316. I never saw my mother again. The doctors said it was a 'Brain hemorrhage triggered by head trauma.' Not that that mattered at the time.

Chris always said our mum was a bit of a hippy. I suppose he has a point, I mean, who calls their kid November? Chris says things like that because he wants Leo and I to think he doesn't care. But he does.

The memories make me taste sick and I turn away from the room. A wave of exhaustion washes over me. I begin to walk further down the steps but as I near the bottom I become too tired to carry on so I sit down and press my head against the wall.

I'm pretty sure its Friday. On Fridays Leo always leaves a £20 on my desk. For most 17 year olds £20 isn't much but I don't really buy a lot other than some packs of smokes and occasionally a Red Bull. I don't even like Red Bull, fucking hate the stuff, but Leo used to drink it all the time when he was about 13. I liked things when we were 13, when we lived at the house with the red door. Every Sunday afternoon Kate and I would ride our bikes up to the shops and Leo would play video games with Toby. It was simple. Now Kate thinks I'm mental and Toby and his gang spray 'fag' on Leo's car in whipped cream. I tried to stay friends with Kate but it was horrible. As we got older it became less about being friends and more about boys. Kate would drag me along with her to parties and one if not both of us would end up getting fucked. I hated that - getting fucked - it made my skin crawl and bile rise in my throat. But I put myself through it, because I was useless and deserved it and if I didn't do it then Kate would call me frigid and boring. I didn't want to let go of my childhood friend. Things change. I didn't want things to change but so quickly they did and I snapped. Slowly, I withdrew myself from the world, little by little until there was nothing left. Just memories. That's when the loop began.

"Everyone's been looking for you," a voice purrs softly. Andrea.

"What day is it?" I reply slowly.

"Friday," Andrea sits down next to me. I sigh. "You must be thirsty, let me go and get you a drink."

"No." She flinches at my tone of voice. "Stay."

"Okay." The morning sun passes by the big window at the bottom on the stairs. It warms me a little. "Third time lucky hmm?" She smiles but I hear the slight crack in her voice. I just stare at my bare feet; ashamed.

"Lucky?"

"Lucky you're not dead."

"Just shut up, Andrea," tears form in my eyes and they drop on to my blanket. Three times. "They're sending me away aren't they?" She doesn't reply. "Aren't they?"

"Yes." The tears fall harder. "It's okay, I work there overnight Tuesday through to Wednesday and on Fridays."

"So why aren't you there now?"

"Shift starts in an hour." I look back out the window. "Pretty isn't it?"

"Not really."

"November?" We both turn to see Leo. "Why did you-" then he notices the tears that slide down my cheeks. He comes down the stairs and I stand up for a second before everything darkens and I fall forward. "Steady," Leo whispers, holding me upright by my shoulders. We all sit down and I just cry. 

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Authors Note: Sorry for the once again late update :/ But hey its only /just/ turned sunday, in England anyway. I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Don't forget to vote :)