Of Waves and War

36: my heart is melting

Penelope

"I said I wanted to see the man that brings word of my husband, have Telemachus send him up," I say, to one of the servants. I've been pacing all evening. I couldn't eat anything. I'm done with waiting. I am so done with waiting.

Eulises

"Come, her sitting room is this way."

"I know that," I mutter.

"Right, sorry, whatever it's this way," Telemachus says, leading me.

"No, you were right, I apologize I'm thinking too much," I say, clasping my hands behind my back to stop their trembling.

"Hey, you, I'm taking this man to see my mother, see that they are waited upon," Telemachus says, to one of the servants, I don't know them. "I'll be waiting outside."

"I would sir, but last week you said none of us were to walk in front of you—,"

"Well, that was last week and now I'm telling you this," Telemachus says, tugging me on, he pauses outside the door, "Go on, she's in there."

"Right," I squeeze his arm quickly. He smiles his soft, kind smile like his mother's, nothing like mine.

I step in. the room is warm, and much like I remembered, her sitting room where she would entertain our few guests, mostly just myself. On the wall hangs a tapestry, a new one. Of an olive tree. My breath catches in my throat. An olive tree, a light house, a peer, and deep cool blue ocean.

"Go on, what do you think you're doing in here?" a servant girl catches sight of me, in the rags that I am, "Get out."

"Why do you have no care? I was invited here, and just because I look like nobody doesn't mean I deserve no respect. I may deserve what the gods have dealt but so shall you," I snap at her.

Penelope

"Leave him alone, I told you I had a guest coming, he is not like the other men," I say, stepping in from the other chamber where I was listening to catch his voice.

"Sorry, ma'am," the girl ducks away, quickly.

"Mother, this is the man I told you of," Telemachus says, nervously.

"Hello," I say, smiling at him, looking for his dark eyes past the shadows of the firelight. "I'm Eulises' wife."

Eulises

....

Penelope

"He knew father during the war—and he might be mute," Telemachus twitches at the door.

"We'll be well," I say to him, "You can wait outside." He obeys, ducking his head and then closing the door and I'm sure leaning against it.

"Where do you come from, stranger? Where is your homeland?" I ask, kindly.

The man puts a hand to his face, almost looking away from me, clearing his throat a bit, before he speaks, then training his sharp eyes back on me, "Dear woman, no man on earth speaks against you, your glory reaches to the wide sky, and you are virtuous and godlike in your ruling of this land. This is your house, and you have every right to question me, but I pray do not ask about my family. Please."

"Well," I say, cautiously, "You are a flatterer, for the gods took my beauty when my husband went away. He sailed years ago, my sweet Eulises, and I have not seen him since, and I care for myself very little in his absence as he was the only one I ever wished to please."

Eulises

"No you are, entirely, as the poets sing my lady," I say, keeping somehow the tremble from my voice as I look at her again. I'm weaker than when I first beheld her. brown eyes glowing in the firelight, small smile on her sweet thin lips.