You Had My Heart [DISCONTINUED]

missing him

After we had finished eating our food, I changed into some silky pyjamas and I soon found myself cuddled up against Joel while watching something on his TV, however I wasn't paying much attention to whatever show was playing.

Something about this man just confused me. There's no denying that he is of course a very attractive man, but it's also the way he cares for and treats others, The way he can change my mood from one second to the next and how whenever I seem to have a conversation with him, I end up kissing him. I felt my eyelids grow heavy with all my thoughts, and so I positioned myself with my head in Joel's lap as I tried to catch some much needed sleep.

Joel's hands stroked my hair as I lay my head on his lap. His gentle touches always gave my goosebumps and butterflies in my stomach. Was I falling for this man? It hadn't been long since I had met him, but I already felt like I had know the guys for so long. After being friends with Aleksi for so long, Aleksi's friends just feel like family to me. They're so accepting of me and I really feel like i've found my place here back in Finland. Soon enough I found myself drifting off to sleep with my thoughts.

I woke up to the smell of coffee and the distant noise of the coffee machine. I slowly opened my eyes and realised that I had fallen asleep on Joel's sofa. He had covered me up with a blanket and had given me a fluffy pillow in replacement for his lap. It was these small things he did that made me like him even more.

I got up and made my way to the kitchen where I saw Joel with his hair up in that fucking bun making us breakfast. I stood in the doorway admiring the view, Why hadn't Aleksi introduced me to his friends sooner? He never mentioned how attractive they all are, especially Joel.

Joel turned and looked at me. He smiled at me as he saw me staring at him.

»Morning, You hungry?« He asked me while he continued to make his coffee.

»A little.« I replied and I let out a small yawn.

Joel made us some bacon and eggs and I helped set the table.

»I have to go to the studio today, do you wanna come?« Joel asked me while eating his bacon.

»I don't think so today, I'm gonna start looking at Jobs and apartments.« I explain and give Joel a light smile.

I couldn't stop thinking about our kiss last night. Joel was in a good mood this morning, but we all know that this could change throughout the day.

We finished breakfast and I headed towards the bathroom to take a shower. I let the warm water cover my body. After my shower, I changed into some leggings and a hoodie since I didn't plan on leaving Joel's apartment today. I brushed my teeth and left the bathroom.

Joel had already left to go to the studio and so I sat on the sofa and started searching for jobs around the area. Since studying music in The Netherlands with Aleksi, I've found myself wanting a job finalising the music of other people, rather than making the music myself, however I found this to be a hard job to find in the area and so I moved onto looking for an apartment. I'm sure Joel is wanting his own space back and so I know I have to move out soon.

I looked for hours at different apartments around the area but none of them fit what I had in mind. They were all too small or I just couldn't see myself living there.

It was around 4pm when my phone ringing. As I saw Aleksi's name on the screen I answered it immediately.

»Hey Idiot, wassup?« I asked him.

»Stop calling me that« He replied giggling on the other end. »We're going out for drinks soon, wanna come with?«

Did I? Yes. I love hanging out with all the guys, but one part of me is reminding me of what happened last time we went out for drinks. I had a panic attack in-front of all of them. I know they're all understanding but it's still embarrassing.

»umm.. sure!« I replied trying to sound as happy as possible for Aleksi. The last thing I want is him worrying about me.

»Okay i'll pick you up in around an hour.« and just like that Aleksi hung up. I won't lie, i've really been missing Aleksi's company since we've moved to Finland. Don't get me wrong, I love living with Joel, but I miss my best friend. I wonder if he misses me as much as I miss him?

I headed to my temporary bedroom and rummaged through my suitcase to find something nice to wear. I ended up picking a simple black dress and some matching black heels. I put on my leather jacket and quickly put on some makeup.

I checked my phone and I got a message from Aleksi saying that Joel was on his way here to get me. Soon I heard Joel walking into the apartment and he started calling for me. I greet him at the front door and he instantly pulls me in for a hug. So he's clingy now? nice.

»Ready to go?« He asks exiting the hug with a huge smile on his face looking me up and down.

He wore black skinny ripped jeans, that black shirt with 'anxiety' written on it with a leather jack and white doc martens. His hair was down and oh my, the parting was killing me on the inside. I just wanted to grab a comb and give him and even middle parting!

»Yep!« I replied sounding cheerful and we exited the apartment heading down the stairs together.

A/N:
Sorry for disappearing for 2 months but your girl has school 🤪
Please give me ideas for this book lmao
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anyway besties I hope to upload more frequently now 💀❤️❤️