Sunkissed skin and summer love (Larry book 1)

020

Here you go (:

"What are you doing in my room?"

Harry drops the controller of his game, just staring at Louis. His mouth gets all dry when he looks at the boy in front of him. He has dark circles under his eyes and those pretty blue eyes don't sparkle anymore. He shouldn't be so affected by seeing Louis in this state because it's not like Louis cares about him.

"I am so sorry. Your mom said you wouldn't be home and... I'll just leave. I'm sorry again." Harry turns off the game and the tv and clumsily he stands up from Louis' couch.

"I didn't tell you to leave, Harry. I just asked you what you were doing in my room. Pretty normal question I guess. I didn't expect you to be here, not that I'm complaining though..." Louis' words go softer and softer.

"I am going home..." Harry wants to walk towards the door but Louis quickly blocks it by standing in front of the wooden door.

"I think we should talk." Louis states after having a billion conversations with Zayn about what to do if he comes in this certain situation.

"I really wanted to talk but you ran away." Harry snaps. "I can take a hint, Louis I am not stupid."

"Harry, please..." Louis begs. "Just go back to my couch and we can talk this out. I don't want to go home with the thought that I lost a very important person to me..."

"Well maybe it helps if you come to my house yourself instead of sending your stupid friends." Harry crosses his arms. "I have been waiting for you to show up for two days and you didn't and when finally the doorbell rings it's fucking Zayn. The only reason you want to talk right now is because I'm in your room anyway and you want to save yourself from feeling guilty. Well, that's not going to happen." Harry wants to walk past Louis but the smaller boy stops him by placing his hand on Harry's chest.

"You got it all wrong, Harry." Louis whines. "Firstly I didn't know Zayn came to your house. Secondly do you think this was all easy for me? You know very well I'm not open about this, not even a 100 percent comfortable and then I get caught by the one person that I know that wants to do me harm."

"Of course he wants to do you harm." Harry mumbles under his breath. "I would want that too if you lead me on for so long."

"Excuse me, what?" Louis exclaims. "I know Jonathan likes to play the victim but he didn't have a reason, still has no reason for wanting to hurt me!"

"You've got to be kidding me, right Louis? You did to him exactly what you are doing to me, using him for your own fucking pleasure. You're sick, Louis." Harry shakes his head and tears are threatening to fall down his cheeks both from anger and from hurt.

"Is that what you think of me?" Louis' voice is soft and it sounds broken, his blue eyes glassy and full of hurt. "I can imagine which story Jonathan told you but maybe you shouldn't judge me and going all 'stay away from me' without hearing mine. I thought we had a connection, Haz and I'm sorry that I ran out but I got really scared that from all people on this fucking planet Jonathan walks in. I handled it all wrong, I hurt you and I'm sorry but the least you could do is listen to me as well before you jump to conclusions."

"Go on, then. Tell me your part of the story. I'm pretty curious why it's so bad that Jonah found us. It's not like he didn't know you enjoy having boys sucking you off, Louis he did it yourself." Harry wants to sound indifferent but a blind person can see he is not. Louis is crying in front of him and Harry feels kind of guilty for reacting the way he did.

"You really hate me, don't you?" Louis wants to laugh humourless but it sounds more like a choke. "And not that it's your business, Harry it really isn't but I will tell you my side of the story which is the truth.

Jonathan and I used to fool around. It all happened on the wedding from his parents. We were drunk, it was fun and we were both discovering our sexuality. We made a pact to fool around and explore together, no strings attached. I made it very clear from the first day that I don't feel anything romantically towards Jonathan, only sexually. He agreed to that until one day he told me he was in love with me. I stopped fooling around with him because I didn't want to lead him on. I was not in love with him at all. You can't hate me for not ever being in love with your friend, Harry. Of course I stopped fooling around. I didn't want him to get more attached because I knew I would never feel this way about him, never.

So out of revenge Jonathan told my father that I was gay, trying to ruin my life. Fortunately my father didn't believe him and I told him that Jonathan just has this weird obsession with me, which he honestly had. But do you know what could have happened to me if my dad believed him, Harry? He knew exactly what he was doing, he knew that the one way to ruin me is my father. He didn't have a reason to hate me. I apologised for not loving him back, but what can I do more? I was never pissed at him for having this feelings because you can't control your heart, I know. I wanted to stay friends, just not with benefits until at least he wasn't in love with me anymore. Tell me, Harry, tell me in my face that I deserved what he tried to do to me just because I didn't love him back." Tears are rolling down from Louis' cheeks and Harry watches guiltily at the floor.

"I'm sorry..." Harry whispers. "But can I ask you... Were you planning to do the same with me?" Harry looks up with his emerald green eyes straight into a pair of blue ones.

"What do you mean?" Louis gives Harry a confused look.

"Would you just stop what we have, had, because I fell in love with you?" Harry bites his lip and Louis gasps, stepping in front of Harry. He cups his cheek, his thumb caressing the soft skin that's mixed with salted tears.

"No, Harry. Because what we have is nothing like I had with Jonathan." Louis whispers, his forehead resting against Harry's, eyes closed.

"What's the difference?" Harry's voice is barely audible but Louis can hear it and a small smile plays on his face.

"Because I actually fell in love with you too..."