"They want me to forget you, to betray you..." she cried stroking the dirt on the ground "I cannot do that, how could I ever do that when I miss you more than anything... you've left me alone in here JJ, what will I tell Jason now? You never got to meet him, he got his blue eyes from you, he got everything from you but he never got you." She let out a little laugh sitting down talking to JJ "but it's okay, we'll meet in a better place again, maybe there we'll be a family" Y/n wiped her tears and got up "I love you" she said as she looked down for the last time before walking away.
It had been a few weeks now since everyone around her began pressuring her to move on into a relationship, they think it would be best for her and Jason if they had a man in their life. Y/n didn't even want to talk about it, how could they ask her such a thing after she spent four years waiting for her love and then lost him forever...
"I can't take care of a baby, dad" she shrieked "I am not that selfish to bring a baby to this world when I won't be able to raise it"
"Think about it Y/n, you know I won't ever abandon you" her dad talked calmly "please don't make this decision when you're this hurt"
"JJ is innocent, all he wanted to do was protect me, he was the one that lead me out of the darkness, of course I am hurt, now it is dark again" Y/n persisted "this is his child, I'm not raising it without him, I'm getting an abortion"
"Y/n please, don't do this, I'm sure JJ wants you to keep his child, he will get out of there I promise, I'll find the best lawyers" Y/n's dad caressed her face wiping her tears away
"I don't think I am strong enough dad" she cried out in his arms "promise me you'll get him out"
"I promise, my princess, I promise" he murmured brushing her hair
"Oh, my princess" her dad quickly pulled Y/n into his hug as soon as he opened the door
"Hey, dad" she rubbed his back
"Welcome home, I haven't seen you and my nephew in forever," he said as he pulled away "and why didn't you bring him?"
"Oh he is with Rafe, they'll be back soon I'm sure," she said as she continued her way to the living room
"Would you like something to drink?" Her dad asked
"Come on dad, sit down please I missed you" she gleamed warmly
"I missed you too my dear," he sighed as he sat down "it's sad without you around, you're always welcome to come back"
"You've done a lot for me all these years, I'm all grown up now dad, besides I know now what is it like being a parent," she closed her eyes for a second "I'm doing my best to be a mother, to give the love I never received"
"Y/n you don't need to think about her now, I'm happy she is long gone, away from us" her dad held her hand reassuringly
"Yeah, I'm sorry let's not talk about her now" she nodded
"I know you are an incredible mother, but are you sure you can keep on raising Jason without a father figure in his life?" He asked
"Dad, you know I don't want to talk about that..." she hesitated
"It is the best for you and him, think about Jason, why should he feel odd from all his friends, why should he always be in need of someone to teach him everything?"
"It feels like I'm betraying him just by thinking these things," she let out as tears rolled down her cheeks "I don't know, I- 'll just try my best to- to be there for my son"
"I assured one day that I will help you raise him, so let me help please, someday you will move on, but it's going to be late because then you'll never be able to fill that gap in Jason's childhood," he said still holding her hand
She took a deep breath and wiped her tears, "I'll just go get some water"
Y/n knew her dad was right, and in some way, she was being careless by not giving Jason the life he deserved, but how could she do that? How could she ever move on? How could she ever do that to JJ, how could his son call another man 'dad'?
YOU ARE READING
look after you ~ JJ x reader
Romance[sequel of Falling for the bad boy so make sure to read that first] A resumed story of Y/n's life after she faced a drastic loss and a lovely blessing.
