Naya and Vince

34

NO REUNION

"Hey!"

I looked up to see Amanda and Aliyah standing before me. They went ahead to sit close to me under one of the big trees in the garden. Amanda removed her glasses and rubbed her eyes. I still wasn't used to her without her glasses.

"You're scarce these days," Aliyah said, a bit of worry lacing her voice. It's been long I spoke to them and ironically we were in the same class. My people-dodging ability was top shelf.

"Exams," I stated curtly and faced my book once again. Exams had started and had been going well and unluckily we have all been drifting farther and farther away. I don't think there was going to be any reunion for us.

"Is there anything we did wrong?" Amanda asked solemnly.

I looked at them and shook my head. "No really. I just need a break."

"Break? For a friendship that has not even gone anywhere?" Amanda asked again, befuddled.

I slapped my book close and groaned lightly. "That's the thing! This friendship would not work. At all."

"What did Jessica do?"

I turned to Aliyah. Sweat shimmered on her dark forehead. "Why do you think she did something?"

"I'm sure I did nothing to you neither did Amanda, you just confirmed that. After that Saturday, I've not seen you and Jessica talk. Jessica would not even agree to talk to you. And you, you avoid Jessica and all of us inclusive, like a plague. So what's up? Spill."

"Well yes. It's Jessica," I confirmed. I sighed sadly. "She just started acting cold to me that Saturday and I decided to take the hint."

"Which hint Nairobi? Know that Jessica can act stupid sometimes. You should have tried asking her what's up. That's what a good friend who values a friendship would do," Amanda said a deep frown marring her features.

Was I a good friend? I had never considered myself good.

Did I value the friendship? Yes. Yes. Yes.

But my stupid ego was in the way.

"I couldn't."

Amanda rolled her eyes and blew out a frustrated sigh. "I don't understand you Naya. Sometimes I like your ego other times it's irks me. To the core."

I frowned. The topic here was supposed to be Jessica and not me. Besides without my so called ego what am I? Who would I be?

It would be definitely something on the line of pathetic.

And I didn't want to be that so my ego stayed.

"Friends don't take breaks. And you just don't take a break because of the other person suddenly goes silent on you. You should have talked to Jessica-"

"Or even us." Aliyah interrupted. "You should have asked questions. You just ghosted. Not cool."

"Yeah. Nobody likes ghosts, Naya."

So what was I supposed to say now? I'm sorry? But the break was my choice and it was for my own good, I shouldn't be sorry for that. I shouldn't be sorry that I took a break to think this whole friendship thing through because since the beginning of the rift, it seemed like each one of them was painfully taking a piece my heart along with them and even if we were to reconcile, there would be more fights and how would I cope with these fights? I couldn't cope with them.

I looked back at the desperate faces of my. . .friends. They wanted this thing to work. They valued what we were building. I valued it too, so why was it so hard to try embracing it again?