A monk and his love

A letter to my love part two

My beloved Yeshe

I remember that you kissed me on the head but I couldn't notice.  When I awoke I felt look throwing up and wanted to go out to puke thinking it was morning sickness but I realized I was at my weakest and couldn't move that much and knew that you were too old to have children.  You weren't there you were collecting the food and begging for money so I couldn't blame you my love.  I hope this is not the cave sickness. When I got enough strength I pulled the prayer flag that I recited the prayers while weeping. When I wasn't weeping on the floor was meditating and chanting in the hopes that I wouldn't die. Then I slumped over the sacred text. That was al I remember then I heard you yelling my name "Nebo" and ran to me apologizing. I told you that you weren't to blame. I told him that my body was faulty.  You dressed me in monk robes that you found in the village and tied my hair back, and laid me on our rug that we sleep on. Proped my head up feed me some food while you were chanting "om mani padme hum" stroking my hair. After you ate and chanted you laid beside me even though I wanted to be alone. You kept kissing me gently, and cried. "I will never leave my beloved nebo alone again." And kept on with the kissing I was stroking your face and grabbing your shirt short hair in the hopes that you won't leave me again. I started to kiss in return, you got on top of me exploring my frail body with your hands and andtje opened my legs and we made soft gentle love. I didn't know why you made love to me when I smelt of shit and vomite. Though you might just have a good reason. I went back to sleep for the rest of after noon. Then I was woken up by a kiss and you fed me more food. You were stroking my face and then told me that you had to shave my head.  You said that I was his novice and that even though I was female so you won't leave me in the cave while begging for food and money.  You then ate and asked if I strong enough to walk. I answered so so, I lied....I wanted to do help me. Which you did. We arrived to awarm pool of water you walked me into the water with my robes on and you got undressed since you did smell vomit or shit. I sat on an underwater rock and you bathed me. You told me that this where you go for a bath and your watery hand was rubbing my freshly shaved head. "I will leave you to be clean, my beloved lotus." I begged for you to return and make love to me again.  My lotus wants to be cared for," you said and I said yes. We embraced and I rapped my legs around you and humped you slowly and kissed you like a mad woman.  When we got clean and dried off you went to the door and yelled "nebo my love the moon is wonderful and beautiful like you." I was putting my robes on and sat out outside on a cliff and joined you for moon gazing. The moon was bright and lit everything up. Then you saw my shaved head and my face and said that I was much beautiful then moon. You tenderly kissed me and said "my moon deity. How beautiful you are!"  We decreitly made love on that the cliff with our robes on.  I was happy to be alive and in love.