Second Lead Syndrome || Diluc R. x Reader

Old Wounds and New Scars

The clock had just struck eight in the evening when Diluc finally got up from his mahogany desk. He could no longer focus the pile of paperwork that seemed to be just endless. His mind has been somewhere else entirely for the past few hours. His palm still tingled where Y/N held it earlier and every time he glanced down at his hand, a small smile crept onto his face uncontrollably.

I'm insane. He thought to himself, and has been thinking this for the past few nights. This woman had been running around his mind all day and all night, every interaction between the two replaying in his mind like a stop motion film. When did I start feeling like this about her? About anyone? He must be absolutely out of his mind.

Just about everything reminded him of her. The halls she once walked, the sofa she once slept next to him in. In all the years Diluc had lived in this winery, never once did it feel so barren compared to his father's old mansion. Now, Diluc can't stop imagining her here occupying space that didn't seem to be empty until now.

He glanced out the window behind his desk. He could see the path winding all the way down to the woods. The woods where Y/N once foolishly wandered into and he had to save her. The first time she ever spent the night with him. Of course, he didn't feel like this about her at the time. In fact, he found her extremely annoying. From what he had heard, she's a Favonius Captain from a Fatui family. Diluc quite frankly had no intentions of getting this close with her at all that night. However, many more nights together came after that because of their trip to Liyue.

Should I invite her to stay again? Diluc couldn't help but ask himself. No, no, no. There's no reason for her to say yes. Don't be stupid. He scolds himself. Besides, how could he think about spending the night with her again now that he's aware of his feelings?

Deciding he needs a change of scenery, he gathered his things and prepared to head out to the tavern. Perhaps he would run into Y/N if he was lucky.

-----

Barely an hour had passed since Diluc reached Angel's Share. He and Charles were tending the bar together, discussing trivial matters and serving patrons. Though Diluc isn't particularly fond of meaningless chatter, he feared if he didn't, he might begin talking about something more meaningful. Specifically, what's on his mind- or rather, who.

The tavern was surprisingly empty for a Friday night. Usually, more Knights show up at the end of the week celebrating whatever accomplishments from the week or just to wind down. The small amount of people made it easier for Diluc to discern conversations from the patrons. He didn't plan on eavesdropping until a name piqued his interest. Y/N. A few rookie Knights were talking about how a big fight went down at the Head Quarters and apparently Captain Y/N handled it amazingly. Diluc couldn't help but smile as the rookies praised their captain.

Then, he heard it. One Knight's sad sidenote that Y/N had to be rushed to the infirmary after the fight. Diluc's smile dropped. She can't be that injured, right? The deaconess can heal her up or maybe I can go check on her tomorrow. He thought, but as time passed by, his anxiety only grew more unbearable.

Eventually, Diluc left the tavern and headed for the Cathedral only to find that he feared correctly. Amber, Kaeya, and Lisa stood outside a closed door where Y/N laid on the other side basically already half-dead.

Diluc was right. He must have been insane. Absolutely out of his mind if he thought he would just have his merry way with Y/N. Being with her almost made him forget about what happened to his father, his brother, or those close to him. They all leave. An earth-shattering reminder to him this was that relationships are fragile no matter how strong the bond may be. The web of a spider may be stronger than steel, but it's thin and can still be cut with a pair of craft scissors.

In the three nights Diluc spent in the Cathedral, he was basically glued to the chair by Y/N's bed. It took heavy persuasion from Jean and even Kaeya for him to go home and take care of himself.

Kaeya tried to joke around a little about how attached Diluc became to Y/N in such a short matter of time, but Diluc was in no mood to even bother responding to his brother half the time. Although, he himself was surprised by how quickly they became so close.

The day Y/N woke up, Diluc could barely even believe it. Had the lack of sleep gotten to him? When he realized she was actually awake, relief washed over his entirety. Praising the Archons, Diluc thought that just maybe he was wrong. Y/N came back, didn't she? Maybe things would be different. With naive hope and a muddled head, Diluc left to clear his thoughts.

Even though he promised he would go see Y/N before the Wine-Tasting, preparations for the party kept him busy. But was work keeping him busy or was he keeping himself busy with work? Was he avoiding facing Y/N? Did he fear getting even deeper in their relationship? What if Y/N waking up wasn't a sign of change, but a warning for him to be careful not to fall into the same trap again? His guilty conscience wondered but Diluc preferred not to answer.

When the Wine-Tasting finally came around and he saw Y/N for the first time in what felt like years, he felt ill. His stomach was swarming with those horrid butterflies, his heart was pounding and the uncontrollable urge to smile was back full force. Despite knowing he shouldn't be getting so close with her when he knows how he feels about her, he still wanted to talk to her. He wanted to cling onto this naive string of hope for as long as he could.

Unfortunately, Kaeya dragged Y/N off, leaving him with Donna, who he remembers as the woman that is obsessed with him. He knows more about Donna than he lets on. Since Diluc doesn't like to judge books by their cover, he pretends the first time he spoke with her was the first time he has ever seen her- the day she came alone with Y/N and Kaeya to pluck some Lamp Grass.
Still, it's hard to ignore someone who freaks out over him every time he walks by or moans out his name in the streets. Diluc may be dense when it comes to romance- according to his brother, but he isn't a complete moron.

But why is Y/N trying to set Donna up with him? He's had countless men and women try to do the same thing with their daughters; Trying to marry them off to him for his wealth. However, Diluc has had no interest in dating women up until recently. So why is Y/N doing this? Does she not feel the same way about him?

Too caught up in his own head, Diluc forgot to pay attention to whatever Donna has been talking about. Frankly, he doesn't care. He hates meaningless conversations. Diluc reaches for a glass of wine uncharacteristically. Though he hates alcohol, he takes a sip. Disgusting. Unlike grape juice- Diluc's preferred drink, the sweet smell of grape is vastly different than the bitter taste. Donna watches with confusion spread across her face as Diluc downs the rest of his glass. But I'll need it. Alcohol is called liquid courage for a reason.

Diluc cuts Donna off, "Sorry, just a moment." He leaves before she even responds and slips past the crowds, deciding to look for the person he's been avoiding the past few days.