How Crazy? (Sasodei)

chapter 9: baby

It had been around a month since the commotion. Sasori had helped Masahiko fix up her house and shortly afterwards Deidara and Sasori returned to base. It was a bit awkward at first but no harm came upon them. Things were oddly normal now which gave Sasori an unsettling feeling. It was strange for things to be going so smoothly but he probably shouldn't complain. Didn't want to dare life to make it worse for them. Deidara and Konan had gotten a lot closer too. She helped him a lot and now Deidara didn't feel as ashamed that he wasn't the only one pregnant in Akatsuki.

The only thing that worried Sasori was Deidara's due date quickly approaching. It still scared him more than ever thinking about the child being born. Then he would be responsible to look after it and... show it love he wasn't sure he possessed. What if he was a terrible parent and it hated him?

The two were getting ready to go to sleep now, Deidara cuddled up against him as usual and wished him goodnight. Maybe he could confide in him now? The blonde had always made things better for him any other time. It felt strange to be in such a sharing mood, but this was something he had to get off his chest. "Deidara, don't go to sleep yet... I want to talk to you about something." Sasori said in a worried tone, causing the other boy to peer his head up. He opened his heavy eyes, in need of sleep but if Sasori no Danna wanted to talk to him then Deidara wanted to hear what he had to say. He didn't mind staying up late, he just hated waking up before he was ready. "Sure. What's up, Danna, hm?"

"Well..." The red head thought over what he wanted to say... He wanted to avoid using the word scared... He didn't want Deidara to think he was a wimp... "I'm nervous that I'll be a bad parent." Sasori admitted. Deidara gave him a sympathetic expression, "I don't think you will. Why do you think that?" "Why? I'm not fit to be a parent... I'm a puppet... What am I supposed to do for a child, Deidara? I shouldn't have led you on this far with dreams of a happy family. I don't fit in to that... I don't know how..." The red head explained, stubborn but upset. "Sasori..." Deidara said comfortingly, pressing his lover against him chest. "You're a great fiancé, and soon to be husband so I think you'll be a great parent too, hm."

"You'd say that no matter what." Sasori pouted against his partner's chest. "You expect too much from me." "I don't expect anything at all, hm." Deidara countered, "I love you so as long as you love me back that's enough for me. And our baby loves you too. You're her daddy so that's enough." "It makes me uncomfortable when you say that... I'm not a father, at least I don't feel like one so stop saying I am." Sasori said with irritation. The other boy sighed, he could tell his Danna was scared of this but he knew he'd never admit it. He poked the red head on the nose playfully. "Aww, are you jealous that I'm mommy, hm? I'm just joking, but I'm worried too. I'm just going to try my best and learn as I go, hm. You don't have to be a perfect parent, Danna so... don't worry about it so much." Deidara took Sasori's hand and put it over his belly.

"Nothing's going to change, we're just going to be together like this. It may or may not be a bit noisier but I think we can handle it, hm.' The blonde chuckled then and Sasori leaned up to kiss him. "I feel a bit better, thank you." The red head admitted, causing his fiancé to grin happily. "I'm glad, hm!" "Deidara..." He began, sinking down to lay against the blondes chest once again. "What were your parents like?" The puppet asked seemingly out of the blue, he couldn't shake the thought of his own past out of his mind and it was bugging him. Deidara paused before he chuckled nervously, "D-Danna... why do you want to know that?" Looking up at him briefly, Sasori wrapped his arms around him. He truly wondered what Deidara's childhood was like... They were getting married but he didn't even know all that much about the blondes previous life. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want. I was just curious is all."

It wasn't like Deidara knew anything about his past life either... It was strange to feel like this, but he felt he wanted the blonde to know, to know as much about him as possible and maybe help him like he'd always done before. "It's okay, Danna. I'll tell you, hm." Deidara announced, "There's not really much to say though, hm... My parents weren't around much at all so I practically had to raise myself... My dad left us when I was young and my mom wasn't much better. I think she blamed me for it or something... To call them parents is an over statement really, I don't even feel like I have any to be honest." He chuckled, to show the red head he -really- didn't care all that much, or maybe to prevent him from worrying. Sasori nodded, hugging his partner tighter. "I'm sorry to hear that." Deidara hugged him back, "It's okay, Danna. My heart belongs with you so I don't care about those people anymore, I never did to begin with, hmm." He said happily.