It was always written ✔️

Chapter 1

The nikah day.

I had turned 18 last week and now I was being married off. I never thought that my father would do something to me.

What am I meant to do?

Do I follow his every order like a good obedient daughter?

Or do I tell him that I don't want this. At all.

But every time I've tried he countered with 'he's handsome', or 'he's rich', or 'he'll take care of you properly'.

I had awoken with a horrible headache and to a spinning room. And then was bombarded with this order.

The headache wasn't calming down. My head felt like it was being slammed against a concrete wall. Nothing was soothing it. And nothing would ever be able to.

My heart was pumping erratically. I was sat in my mother's nikah dress that she had worn so many years ago, the elegant design appeals to me. When I saw it, I fell in love with it straight away.

It was a little tight but I could make it work. I couldn't believe that she was skinnier than me, I was very slim myself.

Little did she know her mother, would starve herself for days on end, because she couldn't deal with pressures of life and yet here her daughter was sat 20 years later, thinking her mother lived a smooth life but that wasn't even close to the truth.

The truth was much more dark and it would only be time, before Alayna found out.

The Nikah dress came with Rabia Bi, an elderly lady who had a radiant noor on her face. One that would hopefully never extinguish.

She sat herself next to Alayna and held her hand placing a kiss on her forehead.

"Beti, your mom gave me this before she passed, she instructed me to give you this dress and envelope when you were to get married. But she wanted me to ask you, "Do YOU want this marriage?" My face fell at that question, do I want this marriage?

Of course not. My father was forcing me. Blackmailing me even, he told me that if I don't go ahead with this marriage then he would kill himself. And I didn't want to be the reason of my own father's death. Did I?

I shook my head. "I don't know," I saw an look pass cross her face, a distressed one.

"Ok, if your not sure. Don't do it. Come with me I'll give you somewhere to stay. We'll escape. There's no point living through a marriage that you'll regret cause you'll find that there will be no way out sooner or later." She finishes looking at the floor sadly.

I stare at her trying to figure out what she was trying to tell me.

Was it.....about my mother?

She looks at me and gives me a warm smile.

She then takes the dress and the envelope and ushers me to get up and start collecting my things.

Just as I'm about to get up, the door to my room slams open. And there stands my father, wearing an angry expression, his nostrils flaring.

His hands in fists.

"How dare you!" He bellowed.

He stormed in Rabia Bi's direction. "How dare you teach such stupid things!" He screamed in her face.

But Rabia Bi knew not to back down, for she wasn't doing anything wrong.

"What Ismail what? Is this how you talk tothe woman who raised you? And anyway I'm not doing anything bad! IF YOUR DAUGHTER IS UNSURE OF HER MARRIAGE, THEN YOU DO NOT FORCE HER!"

He calmed a bit, the storm in his mind slowing down.

"Ayla told me! SHE TOLD ME to make sure you didn't force her into any marriage and I guess she was right. She knew that you knew that you are this shrewd to do such a thing to your own flesh and blood. I thought you'd changed but clearly not." She turned to me, "come on beti. Your coming with me. You can't stay here no more. They don't value you here." She said whilst glaring at dad.

Just as she was to grab my hand, my dad slaps it away. "No. No i said she's going to do I say! I will NOT LET my business fall down the drain because of your stupid mistake."

Rabia Bi's face dropped, "really Ismail. Really? I thought you had changed! I thought Ayla's finally brought out some humanity in you! WHY? Why are you doing this again, last time it resulted in your wife dying, this time do you want your daughter to die?" She shouted, throwing her hands in the air.

"Maybe, just maybe I never changed. That birch got what she deserved especially after not giving me a son and leaving me with her bad omen of a daughter!"

I fell back on my bed, he thought of me as a bad omen.

A bad omen.

Bad luck.

Cursed.

Doomed.

That's what he thought he thought of me. My own father.

Why didn't you take me with my sister and my mom, Allah? I scream in my mind, because my lips were afraid to let the words out.

Kitna Naseebon Se Larr Lenge Hum

The lyrics lived in my head after I heard it in TV one day.

It's telling me. About my own situation.

And then the tears started. I could hear shouting, the banging of things. But it was muffled.

All I could hear were my thoughts.

Little did I know, this would be the least shocking thing for me to find out.

When I finally came back to my senses, I found my room empty. Void of any person.

Next to me laid my mother's list. The envelope place on top.

And next to it a box of envelopes, engraved with the words "For Ayla Khan's Daughter". I curiously opened it. And inside a passage was engraved, "This is strictly for my daughter. If this is my daughter these letters are all yours. They contain some advice and what i think you should if you are in such a position, don't feel obliged to follow it, just take it account. Sorry for not being there doing these hard experiences of life. Sorry for being a terrible mom, I know these won't make up for my lack of presence in your life, but please take it into account, think about it. I'm proving the support I wished I had in these positions. Just know I love you with all my heart, but Allah loves you more. So don't forget Him."

Another tear falls. My mum has done everything for me. Would she be proud of me if she saw me today, in this state?

Another intruding thought was bubbling, but before it could make its entrance my door banged open.

And revealed....

******

How's life, guys?

First chapter is done!