MHA One-Shots

Better off dead - BakuKami angst

Title from 'Better Off Dead' by sleeping with sirens (which I may or may not have related to a little bit)

This is not edited and I must have written it in the middle of the day cuz it's not great. But uh enjoy I guess? I'll probably rewrite this at some point but not rn

TW: Suicide attempt (OD)

~~~~~

Denki sat against their bedroom door, tears streaming down their face. All they wanted was to make their classmates happy, so why did they have to keep making fun of them?

Stupid, Idiot, useless, dunce-face. It never stopped. It hurt so much especially when it came from Bakugo, he was their boyfriend, he was supposed to support them, not put them down. They were supposed to be their friends but they never acted like it, they only seemed to see them as comic relief or a phone charger. They never saw how much it hurt them, and they didn't care.

   "Maybe I'm better off dead..." The words left their mouth before they even registered thinking them. It's not as if this was the first time they'd thought about it, things had never been the best for them, they'd been kinda suicidal for the majority but of their life.

They pushed themself to their feet and walked over to the bedside table, opening the drawer and pulling out the quirk canceling medication, that stopped them from zapping themself in their sleep. They sit on their bed, staring at the pill bottle in their hand, should they do this? What if people missed them? They doubted they would, but they'd probably feel incredibly guilty about this, it would serve them right, Denki thought bitterly, they could be the ones hurt by someone else's actions for once.

Denki decided against writing a note, just downed the pills with the help of the water bottle they kept on their nightstand, and lay back on the bed, letting themself drift away.

~

Bakugo was worried, though he'd never admit to it, he had noticed that Denki looked upset earlier, then they'd run off and he hadn't seen them since. He knew something was wrong, he just couldn't ignore the horrible feeling in his stomach, so he left the common room and headed to his partner's room.

He knocks loudly, "Denki, I know you're in there, open the door!" There was no response, the knot in Bakugo's stomach tightened, he tried the doorknob but it was locked, "Shit," He mumbled, he'd have to force it open, he hoped Denki was in there, and that he wasn't overreacting, so he didn't break the door for no reason.

He used his quirk to blow off the knob, then pushed the door open. Denki lay on their bed, they looked like they were asleep, but they couldn't be, Denki was a light sleeper, especially since they've been at U.A. They would've woken up.

"Denki..?" He asked cautiously, taking a few steps closer to his partner, then everything stopped, there was a pill bottle in Denki's limp hand, an empty one, Bakugo's heart was racing as he lifted the electricity user, their head lulled to the side, "Denki, wake up! Wake up, damn it!" He shook them when he didn't get a response.

"What is going on in here!?" Iida's voice sounded from the doorway.

Bakugo turned to look at him, moving Denki into sight in the process, Iida's eyes widened when he saw them, "Don't just stand there, get help!" Iida simply nodded before activating his engines and running off. Bakugo turned his attention back to his dying partner, cradling them closer, "Please wake up..."

Mr. Aizawa ran in, followed closely by a stretcher, "What happened?" He demanded. Bakugo simply handed him the empty pill bottle, not saying anything, "Okay, put them on the stretcher."

~

Two hours later, Bakugo paced in front of the infirmary door, he hated this, he just wanted to know if his partner was okay. The rest of the Bakusquad, plus Jirou, Deku, Iida, Momo, and Shinsou, for some reason, were gathered in the hallway too, Iida and Kirishima had tried multiple times to get him to stop pacing, but it hadn't worked.

Finally, the door opened and Mr. Aizawa walked out, Bakugo stopped pacing and focused his attention on his teacher. "Kaminari will be just fine, physically anyway."
There was a collective sigh of relief before Bakugo barged past Mr. Aizawa into the room, who knew there was no point in trying to stop him, Bakugo looked around, quickly locating Denki's bed, he was expecting to see them hooked up to a whole bunch of machines, but it was just an IV in their arm and an oxygen mask over their face.

Recovery Girl was on the other side of the room, she didn't say anything when she saw him, she wasn't surprised to see him either.

Bakugo pulled up a chair next to Denki's bed, "Hey, Lightning Bug." He said, taking Denki's hand, Denki opened his eyes and looked up at Bakugo before looking away in shame, not saying anything. Bakugo sighed, he didn't know what to say, he had never been in this kind of situation before, thankfully, "I'm not mad at you or anything, I just wish you'd come to me instead, I'm sorry if I made you feel like you couldn't, and I'm sorry if I pushed you to this, I never meant to hurt you,"

Denki didn't look up at their boyfriend, "It's ok..."

"No, it's not, I never should've said any of that shit to you, you're not an idiot and you're certainly not useless, and I understand if you can't forgive me yet, but please just give me a chance to make it up to you," Bakugo said and Denki nodded.

~

One month later and Denki was doing better, they still weren't completely fine, but they were better. There were days they wished they'd succeeded, and ones they wanted to try again, but they had Bakugo, who watched them like a hawk and aggressively hugged them whenever they seemed like they needed it, or just when he thought about how close he had gotten to losing them. According to Recovery Girl, if he had been even a couple of minutes later in finding them, or if Iida had, then they probably wouldn't have survived.

The only good thing that had come out of all this was that Bakugo had apologized to Midoriya for what he'd said in middle school, Midoriya had of course forgiven him and they had become friends again. That and the whole ordeal had served to strengthen Bakugo and Denki's relationship.

The couple was currently cuddling in Bakugo's room, it was a neutral day for Denki, their mind was pretty calm but there were still a few dark thoughts that floated through it. When it was a really bad one they would shudder and cuddle closer to Bakugo, who would, in turn, hug them a little bit tighter.

"I love you," Denki mumbled, and Bakugo froze in shock, neither of them had ever said that before, Denki looked up, scared that they had made a mistake by saying it too early, but it was their turn to be shocked by Bakugo kissing them, it wasn't as if it hadn't happened before, but it was rare, usually Denki initiated kissing, "I love you, too," Bakugo said when he pulled away, Denki grinned and kissed Bakugo again.

~~~~~

(Original note) So, uh, yeah. This is a thing. I'm rather proud of this. I went full Agender Denki and added platonic BakuDeku because I can.

Ok but I'm not, I kinda hated reading back on this one.

Written: 3-8-2021
Word count: 1200
Posted: 11-29-2021