I don't think I want to leave you here alone

Hate to see you leaving

Trigger warnings- self-blame, sh-kinda, suicidal thoughts.

Wilbur had always wanted a little brother. He grew up an only child, and had no one to follow him around and bicker with him growing up. He thought he would always be an only child until he met him.

Tommy.

Tommy who was going to go so far with his charisma and work ethic(which he hadn't seen in weeks, maybe even months.) Tommy who was his brother in everything but blood. Tommy who was the reason he got out of bed some days.

Tommy who loved his friends and fans. Tommy who he just told that he had disappointed them all.

Saturday 6:00 am
Tommy: hey guys, I know I let you down. I love all of you, please don't be upset. Goodbye. See you on the other side.

What?

What does that mean?

What's happening?

Was he too hard on Tommy? Tommy's only a kid, it makes sense that his schedule would be tough on him. Does it? Tubbo and Ranboo keep up fine! But that doesn't matter right now. Wilbur needs to make sure that Tommy is okay.

Saturday 6:00 am
Wilbur: Tommy?

Wilbur: Are you okay??

Wilbur: What does that mean?!

Wilbur: Don't do anything dumb.

He isn't answering, what should Wilbur do?
He should call him.

Ring

Ring

Ring

He doesn't answer. Tommy is probably just upset and ignoring him right?
He was pretty harsh.

Two hours later...

He'll try ringing Tommy's parents. They should pick up, right?

They don't. His heart drops.

Okay something is up. Why aren't they answering? They always do. Tommy always does. What happened?

Wilbur rereads the message.

See you on the other side.

Wilbur's chest hurts and his eyes water. What the hell? What's happening? He needs to talk to someone. Who can he call?

Phil.

Ring

Ri-

"Hello?"

"Oh Phil, thank god!"

"What's wrong Wil?"

"Tommy's not answering, somethings wrong."

"Mate, not to be a dick but he hasn't been responding for a few days, not to mention that you two had an argument not too long ago."

"Phil, you don't understand, it's not like him, not even recently! His parents won't pick up either! I'm worried!"

"That is a bit more concerning, maybe he told them not to answer you? I can try calling them?"

"Yes, please, Phil call them."

"Okay mate, I'll call you back if they don't pick up."

An hour later.

Phil hasn't called back yet. That's good right? That means they answered, right?

...he should call Phil, just to make sure.

Ring

Ring

Ri-

"Hello?" Phil practically croaks. That's not good. Why does he sound upset?

"Phil? What's wrong?"

"It's Tommy."

His blood runs cold.

"What?" He forces out.

"He- Wil- h-he, I can't say it."

"Phil-"

"He's dead."

A long silence. Wilbur swallows, "what?"

"He was sick, he's been dying and we didn't notice."

Oh my god.
"Oh my god."

"Yeah."

Phil hangs up.

Wilbur's a horrible person. How could he not notice that his little brother was dying. How could he make jokes about his scrawniness. What kind of older brother is-was he?

He's alone again.

Days go by and it's time for his funeral. He gets out of bed for the first time in days to try to get ready for Tommy's funeral. He can't bring himself to look in the mirror. He can't even bring himself to call it Tommy's funeral. It's all too surreal. Tommy had so much to do, so much life to live. How could he die so young. Why wasn't it Wilbur.

Wilbur should have been the one to die. Wilbur is useless. He can't reply to his worried friends- or read their angry messages asking where he is. He can't comfort Tubbo or Ranboo about their teenage friend's untimely death. Wilbur can't bring himself to sing, always thinking of Tommy. Tommy who would excitedly listen to his new music, always showering him in praise. Wilbur can't even get out of his house to go to his little brother's funeral.

Wilbur looks up to the mirror and sees how sickly he looks. Cheeks sunken in, bags under his eyes, greasy hair- all he can see is Tommy. Sickly Tommy. How did he not notice? Tommy died thinking that he had abandoned him, over a mistake-not even a mistake, over something he couldn't control.

Before he can even process his actions, his mirror is shattered and there is glass embedded into the palm of his hand. He looks down at the blood dripping down his sleeve and for the first time in days he smiles. Tommy had been hurting, he could too. He palms a shard of glass and practically crawls back into his room.

Wilbur could kill himself right now, and be with Tommy again. He should. But he can't. He can't do that to his already grieving friends. He couldn't do that to Tommy, this would be the last thing he would want. Wilbur smirks as he feels a familiar weight in his hands. So he'll settle for the closest thing, for now.

Authors note: sorry about how long this took, I was honestly lacking ideas and motivation-also sorry if it seems rushed- I got the idea and just wanted to write it. I also apologize about how dark this chapter got- I honestly wasn't expecting out to turn out this way lol I'll probably work on Phil's POV next, but if you have any ideas on who should be next feel free to let me know:) thank you for reading my story and being patient with me!