Love is for Losers

Chapter 2

      -Mia
        I grin at Abby, taking her entirety in one last time. Her perfectly naturally straight dirty blonde hair in a messy bun, a large Army tee-shirt on, black leggings with a pair of brown boots. I quickly say bye, hopping on my bike, and ride off. Ah, my best friend. So beautiful. I love her so much. I know it seems normal to say that I love her but I love her more than I should. After I hit puberty at eleven and a half, I've started having different feelings than I did when I was little little. I started liking Abby more than I should have.                                                                                                                                                     I just wanted to be with her. To kiss her pink lips and hug her tight. To pick her up randomly, and carry her around while she giggles for me to put her down. I want to dance and sing with her. I want to make her feel like a princess every day of her life for the rest of her life. I've known Abby for two thirds of my life and I want to know her for so much longer. I wanted to make Abby my wife, adopt children, and live a happy life together someday. On Sundays, get the kids up and dressed in nice dresses and fancy clothes and go to church in the morning. To be accepted as a perfectly happy and normal family, not judged and discriminated for our sexualities.

      I told my older sister how I felt and asked her for help about it one or two months ago, she had a grim look on her face when she told me, "It's just a phase sis, those disgusting feelings will pass. You know that homosexuality is a sin, you want to go to heaven right?", her lips turning into a straight line, as she looked at me. I nodded, tears brimming my eyes, saying, "Yes, I do. I really do wanna go to heaven" she says, "God won't accept you into heaven if you're gay, so just ignore the feelings and they'll go away", I nodded, thanking her, hugged her, and she left me alone. 
       Tears start rolling down my cheeks as I ride my bike, taking a sharp turn onto the bridge. She had told my parents about it and they're extremely Christian. They screamed at me then took everything away from me, did something to my phone so all I can use it for is checking the time, my brother found out from all the screaming and began beating me when no one was looking, and my parents began blaming each other for my sexuality as if it's the worst thing ever to be gay. I guess it is... I get off my bike and leave it at the entrance of the bridge on the grass, grab my small bag, and begin walking down the side walk on the bridge, beside the road. I stop when I reach the middle of it, slipping the bag off my back, shoving my phone in the bag along with the jewelry I'm currently wearing. I also take off my combat boots, and set them beside my bag, which is now on the ground. 
        I look off into horizon, the sun is going to begin setting in approximately thirty to forty minutes, so I've got to get this finished soon before my parents call the police of my missing since I'm usually home before dark. I sigh and climb onto the edge of the railing, looking down at the water multiple feet below me, higher than usual due to recent rain. Heh, I guess even god knew something was wrong. Closing my eyes, I think of all the times I can remember that I had with Abby, good or bad. I think of her smile and her beautiful singing. I never told her how much of a lovely singer she is, I hope she becomes a singer someday. I remember her singing, a car honks at me but she's still singing 'All of Me by John Legend' to me as I allow my feet to slip and let my body go forward, wind going through my hair then the wind is water. Water all around me.
         I don't struggle, I open my eyes instead. My mouth is open, bubbles coming out of it, I smile at this. Just like in the Little Mermaid, right? Who knew? Drowning isn't as bad as it seems. I couldn't move my body if I wanted to. My body is frozen in shock, my heart beat is slowing down, I begin to get sleepy. I allow my eyes to close and my muscles to relax as  Abby sings me to sleep in my final moments. I love you Abagail... 

                                                                  "My head's underwater
                                                                   But I'm breathing fine
                                                    You're crazy and I'm out of my mind 
                                                                       'Cause all of me
                                                                       Loves all of you
                                                   Love your curves and all your edges
                                                       All your perfect imperfections..."