Teacher

A Little Glimpse of My Past -Mr. Wood

Mr. Woods POV

Ugh, this is going to be so embarrassing! But I do wanna let him know some... It's only fair.

I shift a little. "So uhm...my life has never been so easy. Or great, as you know, I lived in that apartment..despite being a teacher at your school. Maybe you'd think I would be a little less poor as a teacher but...yeah. I'm sorry you had to see that shameful side of me. It's something a student shouldn't see of their own teacher, although you did come to my apartment... Ahem, anyway. My past is kinda hard to say," I scratch my head nervously. This is so hard but I want to tell him if not anyone else, because...I have no one else. Jack rubs my arm reassuringly. I exhale a soft breath before continuing on. "Even if I had all the money in the world and the best living conditions, I'm afraid I still wouldn't do so well on my own...because I don't know how to properly take care of myself, honestly... Early on as a child, my parents left me, as in full-on abandoned me. So I was in and out of orphanages a lot as a child. As I got older, I was still in and out of places to stay while I was able to go through school provided by the government but it wasn't easy. However, there was a home I did stay in for a while that actually lasted me until I was able to get my teaching degree. The person who housed me and took care of me was nice. I...personally feel I owe him my life, or to give something back to him for what he did... He allowed me to pursue my career. Unfortunately, he died in an accident a year after I got my teaching degree. So I was left alone again but I was an adult by then, so I had to find a place to stay on my own. The apartment I'm living in currently? That's an abandoned building that somehow has some electricity left without a landlord. Don't ask, I have no idea either. But it's not far from the house I stayed in, so you can see why. Well, that's partly why I chose it, but with it being abandoned, you know, means no rent...heh...," I let out a breath after saying all that. My past is kind of pathetic when I think about it though...

Silence falls upon us, Jack letting me think and get my thoughts organized, I assume. He continues stroking my arm and back softly for comfort. I lean into it while I process what I said...

"...Awe, come here love, you're okay. You're doing great, I'm proud of you...baby," Jack says and gently hugs me, wrapping his strong and bigger arms around me. I didn't realize I was crying until he hugged me but now I feel the warm silent tears fall down my cheeks.

I cling into his embrace and hold on tight to him, letting out the emotions that have long plagued me and...feeling comforted for the first time in so long. The last person who made me feel this safe was the same guy who took me in. He was almost like a father to me...

More tears escape when I think of the tragic death he faced. I...I really wish...I wish so much that he was still here, that I could tell him everything that has happened since he died, hug him, let him know how I truly feel, and show the appreciation I have for him taking me in long ago.

I sniffle and clear my throat, deciding to say a bit more despite the tears.

"...I feel the time he took me in, I was a clueless kid and all those years he took care of me. I didn't know how to express my emotions properly and I was always a mess, pretty clumsy, and I needed his constant care. He never got mad at me or made me feel bad, he just always encouraged me to speak my mind and validated my feelings whenever he could. No matter how busy he got, he always made time for me. He even gave me baths in my teenage years, because I was horrible at it and I always got scared of being in the bathroom alone for so long. He never got disgusted that someone that old needed basic help, he just took care of me the same way as always... And when I was sick as an adult, I became even more useless. I just sat in bed and threw up in a trash can--I don't get up or do anything. The only thing I do otherwise would be go to the toilet but even that...upon occasion...have had some accidents--BUT I WAS SICK SOOOO-- Anyway, the point is, he never cared that I needed such basic help, he always provided it no matter my age. But there was a time he got concerned for me and spoke his mind. He told me that he doesn't judge me for how I am, for who I am inside but he worried one day when he is no longer around, that I would be left alone... Yeah. I considered that but I didn't let it get to me. I told him I would be fine or I'd do all I could to keep him alive and I would even learn how to take care of him in his old age, although he doubted it because of how useless I am to myself, heh... I'm sad I never got to see him get old, because he died that young...," I let out a sigh.

"When he did die, I was lost--incredibly lost. His concerns were right, more right than I ever would have liked to admit. I was truly hopeless and helpless from that moment on. I didn't know what to do... I'll be honest, my thoughts went very dark. I...I thought about...," I bite my lip, unsure about saying this next thing to my own student. Well, saying any of this to my student is already crossing the line, so I don't know what else I could lose. I've already accepted I'm going to lose my job for this...

Jack seems to know exactly what it's about pulls me gently into his chest and caresses my hair.

"It's okay, Mr. Wood. Everyone has something dark in their life, even if they're the most professional or most famous person on earth. The truth of the matter, we all struggle. Parents, professionals, perfectionists, and anyone else who does not look like they struggle, they do. It's all about being vulnerable enough to show it and to whom you trust or can get help with, if need to. And being brave and strong, just like you! You're a very strong and brave boy!" I slap his arm because I know he's treating me like that again. He lets out a soft chuckle. "But It's just life, so it'll be okay," he whispers into my ear and kisses my head.

I can't help but blush. He has a point, but it's so embarrassing. Especially with our positions. Urgh... "Well, uh... Well, if everyone has something dark, how about you? Or are you as perfect as you appear to everyone else?" I say sarcastically and raise an eyebrow at him. He laughs.

"Is my baby curious?" He laughs more when I glare at him. "Well, of course, nothing is perfect, so no. Even I have had bad times. I even had depression for a period of my life, but something made my life better despite everything else. Something very special and very important to me. Something extremely precious to me... Can you guess what it is, Mr. Wood?" He asks with a smirk.

I flick his head in response. "Stop being sus and acting like I'm a child," I say in a huff. He just smiles in response and kisses my head again with affection. Ugh, this guy! I cross my arms.

He pats my head and leans back. "Well then...as it goes..."