Maya (Book #3)

Chapter 16

When I got out, I towel-dried my hair and brushed it out neatly. I threw on an oversized pajama shirt and some shorts and then walked across the hall. When I got to Dominic's bedroom door, I knocked.

"Come in!" he called loudly. I pushed the door open with my foot and walked inside, looking around for him.

He was working at his desk in the corner, so I went over to him and waited for him to finish what he was doing. He turned from his computer and gave me a kind smile.

"How're you doing today, kid?" he asked, eyes turned down sadly. I wished he didn't have to see me last night, how I was. I knew it hurt him to see me frown, let alone be in so much pain.

"I'm good... much better!" I reassured him, playing with my hands. His room was cold so I pressed my body in, wrapping my arms around my torso.

"Good to hear," he said. "I'm sorry I couldn't really help you much." He looked defeated and I tried to change his thinking immediately.

"Oh, my gosh, no. You helped so much. You weren't going to be able to fix my mind! Even Charlotte can't do that," I joked, making him glare at me. He didn't like my self-deprecating humor.

"Sorry," I said, shaking my head to get back on topic. "I just wanted to ask what happened after. You know, with Asher?" I took in a deep breath and held it, scared to hear his answer.

"Oh!" he said, nodding his head. "I went downstairs and told him you weren't feeling well. I kept it vague and then shook his hand and said it was great to meet him. Caleb walked him to the door, and we all went to sleep. It was pretty uneventful."

I interlocked my fingers and wiggled them, processing this. It didn't sound terrible.

"Do you know if he saw me cry? Or jump on you or whatever?" I said, trying not to blush. I don't know what possessed me to attack Dominic but, at the moment, I knew he would help me.

He didn't laugh or tease me to his credit.

"I don't think he saw either. I think he thought you were going to the bathroom or something. It was dark and I know he was watching the movie as we left. Maybe he thought we were grabbing more popcorn." Dominic said with a shrug. I released a huge breath and bowed my head, thinking that over. If it were true, it would be exceptional news.

"Okay, perfect! Thank you so much, Dom!" I said, spinning on my heel and heading to the door.

"Wait, come back!" he said, pushing his swivel chair over on its mat towards the bed. He motioned for me to hop on the bed and leaned back in his chair.

 "What is this, therapy?" I asked with a smirk. He bobbed his head again and I rolled my eyes and sat on the edge of the bed, facing him.

"Yes?" I asked, stretching the word out.

"Do you want to talk about what happened yesterday?" he asked seriously. His voice was deep and his eyes were focused on me. 

"What about it?" I asked in a monotonous voice, trying to lose all feeling. I didn't want to bring it all back when I had just managed to push it down.

"Maya. You don't have to be like that. If you work through it now, it won't have to bother you later." He suggested softly. He spoke with the wisdom of experience, which is why I listened to him.

"Ugh," I said, leaning back and falling on the bed. "Do I have to?" I joked, trying to avoid actually answering him.

 "Yes. Well, no," he said. "But you should."

"Fine. What do you want to talk about?" I asked, putting the ball back in his court. Talking about feelings was worse than death. It was torture.

"Last night... It was the movie that was upsetting you?" he asked dolefully, looking down at me. I pulled the blankets up over me and grinned at him without answering. Perhaps being playful would distract him. He gave me a look forcing me to answer, so I nodded.

"The dad," I spoke. "In the movie. He was bad." I glared across the room at nothing, picturing the evil man in the film. He hurt the girl! A voice in my mind shouted.

I didn't know what was coming over me, but a feeling spread through me that I couldn't describe. It was like I was going out of my body, but it was still me in there. I just felt childish and younger. I wasn't using the same vocabulary or thinking in the traditional patterns my mind fell into. I felt different. I shifted under the blankets, trying to get used to the size of my body. Shouldn't I be shorter? Smaller?

 "He did hurt the girl. He was going to hurt her even more when you walked out. Why did you leave?" he asked sensitively as if he were speaking to someone much younger. His eyes were watching me very closely, but I didn't care anymore. I wasn't big Maya. I was little. And she wasn't bothered by someone watching her. She was used to it.

"Bad," I repeated petulantly. "It hurt her." 

The words I was saying weren't expressing what I wanted them to, but I was helpless to the involuntary change. 

"Just like you were hurt?" he pressed gently, looking at me sadly. I nodded.

"Uncle," I explained, eyes going wide as I thought about it. I pulled the covers up further, trying to control my fear and the pounding in my head. It sounded like footsteps. They were coming for me, like always, and I couldn't stop them. 

"Your uncle hurt you," Dominic said, nodding. He knew that already. "I'm so sorry Maya. You're very brave."

I shook my head. I wasn't brave. I was scared, all the time. That wasn't bravery.

"No," I whispered as tears filled my eyes. 

"You are!" Dominic said, treating me like a kid. It was as if he knew what it felt like. Maybe he did. "Your uncle hurt you, but you stayed alive and stayed yourself and you're still here! That's brave to me."

I tried to argue with what he said, but I guessit was true a little bit. I giggled and shrugged, before getting up andrunning over to hug him. He hugged me back and whispered, "It's okay littleone. You're safe now. He's not coming back." 

I sobered up and myadult mind rose to the surface as I remembered that wasn't true.