General crap and thoughts

A poem for myself

I can't stand looking at you
while you ruin yourself

Your beautiful hair
the way your face lights up when
being set in sunshine

I can't stand letting you go
leaving you with the absence of safety

So I hold on to you
like I would hold on to
my mother's hand
when we were taking promenades
at the local park

And I think about all the things
I would do
to conjure a smile on your
pretty, young face

And I think about all the things
I could do
to make sure you were
never able to
ever hurt yourself
or to think about hurtful thoughts

And I would assure you at times
it does get better
and you can love yourself

Although this goal may be
too far set
too difficult to accomplish

And in the meantime you would
already crumble altogether
and I would watch you
struggle to stay whole

And at those times
I won't be there
to tell you things get better

I would be there for you
to tell you
you deserved this anyway
and I would watch you
fall apart and
let you shrivel all the way
to the inside

But for now
I will promise you
I won't ever let things like that
come into my mind

And I will promise you
to love you
and take care of you

So let's pray things like that won't
ever have to happen