It only takes a week

Tuesday (6)

The next thing I hear is Cat's footsteps approaching me. I look at her with my dry eyes and I can see her smile fade away. "You look like shit" She says sitting down beside me. The word shit even reminds me of him, can I ever escape him. "Don't say shit" I sniffled. "Yeah, you look like trash" She corrects, bumping into me. I smile "Thank you Cat" I say resting my head on her shoulder, looking at the school with her. "No problem, do you wanna talk about it?" She asks. "Not really" a little nervous laughter follows "Okay, we can talk about prom if you want" She says still looking at the school. "That would be nice" I say, thankful for having her with me right now. "What themes do you have in mind?" She asks, clearly guiding my mind off the shit, no terrible event that went down just minutes before she got here. "I was thinking a starry knight or under the sea" Cat laughs, shaking my head with her vibrating shoulders "Under the sea? What am I supposed to wear a crab costume and a red wig" I laughed with her for a minute. Cat and Alex do have some similarities unfortunately. "Well what do you have in mind?" I say, looking at my knees curled to my chest and her legs spread out on the field. "I thought something like greek mythology, where you dress up in draped clothing and gold leafs in your hair" I smile "That's a good idea" I answer, taking a deep breath in. "When are we planning this?" I ask "Well we have all the time until friday, so we don't have to do school all this week" She exclaims "Well now im happy im a part of this" I say, thinking, a whole week off for prom, great deal. Except Alex is going to be there. "What do we do about Alex" I ask, she probably has some great plan for this. I hope so, because I don't. "Well i'm going to talk to him after class" She interrupts, looking at her phone "In about ten minutes, then we will take it from there" "Is it maybe okay if I catch up with Oliver while you talk" I ask. I really hope she says yes, i can't face him after our talk just yet, maybe ever? "Sure, it's private anyway you should do that" She smiles, nudging my head off her shoulder, before standing up, pulling me with her. "Let's find them, we can sit in one of the private rooms brainstorming ideas with them after our talk" She says as we walk closer to the school. She wraps her arm around my shoulder. "Thank you for coming all the way out to me" I say as we enter the school again "It wasn't easy i can tell you that" We laugh as we find the dismissed english room. "I guess they're gone, do you have Alexanders number" "I dont" I look at the ground "Wait I have it" She says scrolling through her contact "Should i call him or is it weird" Why does she have his phone number, why does he have hers "Just call him don't think about it" i say, my tone it probably grumpy or mean. But the unfamiliar feeling is making my stomach turn and my eyes foggy, is it jealousy? I have never been jealous before, i've never had to, i've got everything, it's just a phone call away. "Right it isn't weird we are planning prom together, it's just schoolwork" She murmurs, giving herself a little pep talk, before ringing him. She puts her phone to her ear, looking at me as she rest against the wall "Hey Alex, where are you we need to talk and plan prom" She says, her tone isn't flirty, but it isn't her normal voice, it's like they're best friends and past lovers, maybe still lovers, i hate that. I hate that his heart does not belong to mine. It makes me wonder if my heart will ever belong to someone or is it enough to have yourself, to have self love is that enough. "Sure we can meet in five, room 515 sounds just fine" She says smiling at the tile floor, crossing her legs, her cheeks are slightly rosa, She must have feelings for him. Otherwise she wouldn't correct her little bangs every two seconds. She hangs up, jumping in the air "Omg Gen that went so well, it was like we've never been awkward or anything" "That's great" I pretend to be happy for her, i wish i could, but my heart is filled with so many emotions, i can't possible be happy right now. "We should go" She yoinks me with her, dragging me through the school and into room 515.