IN WHICH she's just another player in his drinking game.
at the party tonight, you said you couldn't leave my sight
"hey, nini! i was looking for you." ricky spoke, putting his arm over my shoulder. i immediately sunk into his touch with a content grin.
"why's that?" i yelled over the loud music, looking up at the honey haired boy, who just grinned wildly at me.
"no reason. just got bored of everyone else!" he grabbed my hands and pulled me away from the tree i had been leaning on.
"really?" i quickly cleared my throat and corrected myself, not wanting to seem TOO desperate... even though i was. "i mean, uh, that so?"
ricky nodded, his silly curls bouncing.
'cause you don't seem to like the way the boys say i have pretty eyes
i walked back into the big house with ricky, his hand wrapped around my waist tightly. we walked to a counter with foul smelling punch.
ricky let go of me and walked over to the fridge, pulling out a mt. dew can. he grinned at me cheekily, "i won't let you drink that gross shit." he handed me a can, opening his own. i did the same and laughed at his comment.
just then, ej caswell walked into the room. he glanced at me, totally ignoring ricky's existence. weird, right?
he leaned down to take a good look at my face and looked into my eyes. he hummed before speaking.
"yo, neens, you've got pretty eyes." he nodded to me before standing up and walking away. i watched him, confused. that was so weird.
"i don't like him."
"why not?"
"he's weird."
"ricky, he is not!" lie.
"yes he is!"
"no, ricky, he's not." another lie.
"fine."
so we go for a ride, you'll cry, say that i make it alright
i followed after ricky, my eyes frantic. he was storming out of the house after seeing me having a conversation with ej. it was weird. man, boys are weird!
"ricky! are you okay?" i asked once i got into his car with him.
he turned to me and i saw the tears welling up in his brown eyes.
"do you like him?"
"what?"
"answer my question!" i flinched at the sudden yelling, but still responded.
"who?"
"my god, nini. are you stupid? ej!" my mouth opened slightly at his words, but it's okay. he's just been drinking, he doesn't know what he's saying...
"no, i don't, ricky." true.
"yes you do!" fuck, a lie.
"stop it! i don't! why do you even care?" oops, mistake.
"because you make everything okay! when i'm away from you, i just - i dunno. i just feel so lost, y'know? but then, when i am with you, i'm alright!"
"oh." dammit.
"oh?" he laughed airily, turning to me. now he had tears soaking up his face.
"i just - is that... a good thing?" i asked.
"yes, nini. it's an amazing thing."
"oh." holy shit, am i stupid?
ricky just looked at me, a look of longing plastered into his eyes. i tried to hard not to kiss him. but it was really hard.
you dance with our friends shining, shining, laughing with them like you weren't just crying to me
ricky and i had left his car and now i was on the sofa, watching him laugh and dance with kourtney and big red. i sighed, knowing he would probably never tell them about the "moment" we just had in his car.
it seems to weird to see him so excited and happy just after crying to me. it makes me wonder if that's how it is at school when he skips classes. is he crying then?
i sigh sadly, watching my favorite person fake his happiness. i felt bad. i knew it wasn't my fault, but for some reason i couldn't help but think it was.
but you know what i see when you're looking at me, i am reminded that we'll never be
while he was dancing, ricky turned to me with a devilish grin. it's almost like he knows he's torturing me.
he looked me in the eyes, unknowingly shooting butterflies into my stomach.
then, his dumb girlfriend walks up to him, dragging his attention from me.
i sighed, now realizing we would probably never be together. i mean, he has a girlfriend! a perfect one at that. she's gina porter, for god's sake.
a tall, straight a student, and just - gina porter-y! does that make sense?
i shut my eyes and pretended i wasn't there.
and you say once we're sober that we should just forget
ricky and i sat on a slide at the local playground, sharing a bag of shortbread cookies.
"hey, neens?"
"yeah?"
"i'm sorry about last night."
"sorry for what?"
"for putting you in that awkward ass position.."
i shook my head and turned to face the boy, shaking my head. "don't worry! you can talk to me any time,i promise i'm here for you."
he grinned at me. "thanks, nini. it means a lot."
i nodded and turned away, leaving us in a comfortable silence.
15 minutes later, i feel ricky's hand over mine. shit. butterflies.
"i wish we could just forget things we do when we're drunk after it wears off. like - what's the point in being sober if you'll just remember everything anyway?" i didn't answer, since i didn't know how to respond.
'til you call me cutie and ask if we're drinking
i groaned when i sat down in the passenger seat of ricky's car. my day SUCKED.
"hey nini, i'm gonna guess your day didn't go to well?" he asked.
noooooooooooooo, really? damn, i thought i won the lottery.
"yeah. i'm not sure if i want to go to the party tonight." i stated, turning my head to ricky.
"aww, please neens? i'll do anything!" anything? be my boyfriend <3.
"you owe me a box of shortbreads."
"okay, cutie. so we're drinking!"
i nodded with a crimson blush on my neck, which was snaking up to my cheeks.
time to repeat last night.
word count: 1,017
