✔︎ SLOWLY • jake

m

i laid by the cold concrete ground of the graveyard hall.ㅤ

yes, unlike the stereotypical claims of a wandering soul,

i could still feel the physical world, i could still feel emotions.

ㅤ

the night was still young.

stars twinkled up in the pitch black sky and the winds sway the trees into a comforting dance.

ㅤ

i looked up and sighed,

why am i still here?

don't souls either go to heaven or hell once they die?

ㅤ

i'm... confused.

why am i even dead anyway?

ㅤ

that question lingered in my mind longer than i should've let it.

i forgot why i'm in this situation,

yet I feel no regret and sadness at the mere point of being dead.

fragments of my past will always remain unlear to me, for i only brought memories of my fiancé with me.

ㅤ

..or so i thought.

ㅤ

thousands of needles suddenly pierced through my chest and into my heart.

as you may imagine,

it's a very painful experience,

but I have grown used to it.

this is always what i feel everytime i try to remember something.

but unlike my usual attempt to recall what hasn't been remembered,

ㅤ

i suddenly felt suffocated,

and...

ㅤ

molested.

ㅤ

sensations of non-existent hands explored my body and shamelessly violated my own volition.

ㅤ

i feel my hair being harshly tugged and pulled,

even when my wavy locks were peacefully laying flat on the ground.

ㅤ

i feel two strong grips from my feet and my body felt like it was getting dragged against the hard concrete floor even though i was still,