Today was the day, no longer would I spend my entire life confined within these four walls, only getting out of my bed to look for my next meal. No longer would my thirst for more people be quenched solely by that person on the other side, delivering me my precious nourishment, or any new device to entertain my mind.
For the first time ever, my house, which, despite its size, was more than sufficient to fit me and allow me movement, seemed too small. This time in my life, I felt bigger, bigger than I usually am, big enough to seek more, seek something new. Enough with the four walls, restraining my body, heart and soul. Enough with the sights I grew used to over the years, my bed, my desk, my computer.
It was time for exploration, time for discovery, time for new thrills, time for a new world, and this new world, I knew exactly where I would find it. Down a seemingly endless 24 stairs, that strained my muscles, and put my body to a nigh unbearable amount of strain. A trial fit for my newfound determination. Many times have I thought that it was too much, that my worries were insignificant when compared to the pain my legs went through, such pain that my mind couldn't even comprehend it.
This pain in my legs vibrated through my stomach, belly flab obtained by experience, scars reminiscent of the harshness of the human life, a life of wondering which of my over 2000 games I need to boot up to make it through the day. Scars from a life I was determined to move on from, towards greener pastures. Towards the unknown.
The mere thought of what lied beyond my house got my mind shaking with the infinite possibilities. What kind of food this other world could provide? What entertainment is there to enjoy? Do they even know about me? What kind of cultural knowledge can I give this foreign race? Hell, from what I know, I may even need to learn a new language. Maybe there are no people, maybe I'm alone, maybe I will die right this moment.
The sheer amount of questions about what lies away was almost dizzying, the trial I was facing didn't help me feel any better. Holy gods of anime catboys, if you are real, please give me the strength to continue on. As I reached the last stair, relief overtook me, I stumbled and fell down, as the adrenaline went out and the exhaustion settled in. There I was, in a place I only spent fleeting moments in, downstairs.
Sweat was slowly building up as my body was getting increasingly more dizzy, but, as my gaze brushed away at the few unseen corners on this floor, my heart skipped a bit.
For the first time in what seemed to be forever, the light from the sun shone on my pale body. The blinding light from a place way out of reach made my body recoiled in a fear fueled by survival instinct. This was my second trial, which I faced with all the courage I could muster after the stairs broke me physically. My foe was very resistant, as the afternoon sunlight stood strong. If it were any other day, I would back down and get back in my bedroom, but this time, a voice in my head told me that the joy I would feel from the many trials succeeded might even exceed what I would feel after getting 2 SSR characters in a row.
A joy that no anime, no pizza, no porn and no body pillow has made me feel in years. The joy of being the one in charge of my own destiny.
After a few hours of rest, I could feel myself able to move. Despite the pounding of all my muscles, the liters of sweat making the already greasy floor all the more slippery, and my eyesight challenged by the light of the gods, it was time.
The corridor was narrow, so narrow in fact, that it served as a grim reminder of what awaits me, shall I turn tail and go back to my room. The crushing weight of loneliness, the melancholy of having nowhere new to go, of having nothing new to learn. This was all something I left behind the second I stepped out of the comfort of my bed, the moment I stepped out of my comfort zone. As one steps becomes two, and two becomes three, and three becomes an absurdly large amount, one that felt infinite, as if I was walking a path with no end.
But eventually I met it, my final challenge, the one that separates me from a new experience. The door, puzzle from hell, the one that got me to give up all my trials until there, but this time I'm a new man.
This time, I'm prepared. With my shaking masturbatory hand, I grabbed a set of keys. The trail of dust from retrieving the lost artifact left a tear in my eye, symbol of the fight that still remains within me.
Key by key, I try, this last foe was a tricky one, as every single failure would set me back a few more minutes, a few pivotal minutes, which could make the difference between life and death. Eventually, after what felt like an endless amount of attempts, one manages to get through the keyhole. My eyes gleam in happiness, never before have I made it this far, this was the result of years of tutorial videos, years of learning from the most reliable experts. Years that lead me to this point.
I turn the key, the door unlocks, I push, it resists. I panic, I don't understand! Putting the key was supposed to be the hardest part! In my desperation, I push even harder. This was the fated meeting between the two mightiest fighters of the universe. This was the unstoppable force versus the unmovable object, the Batman to my Joker, the Jojo to my Dio, Karen to my foreign waiter.
This battle, was one of the many that would be fought fiercely, only to fade away in front of the undying wind of history. After a valiant struggle, I yielded, my arms were numb, while my foe was weakened, but stood still nonetheless.
Eventually, the enlightenment reached me, the genius that made humanity so resilient unleashed itself in me, as my brain trembled in excitement. With the last of my strength, I grabbed the handle, and pulled.
The door opened.
