Kenshi, The Spirit Swordsman

Chapter 32

Sinon: You mean... you've killed someone too?

Queen: Yeah. But I didn't kill only one, but a dozen of people. You know, the name Queen is not something that I made up. It's the name from the old me, White Queen.

Sinon: White Queen...

Queen: Long story short, in the Neighboring World, not virtual world, I was a Queen and acted like one. I've done so many terrible things. I sacrificed my soldiers for my sake, killing people just for my goal and so much more. I remember the time when I almost killed Kenshi the first time.

Kenshi: You also kidnapped Hibiki too.

Queen: That, too.

Kenshi: You know, I remember that time as well. Man, I thought I could beat you but I was wrong. After that, you tortured me just for your experiments.

Queen: Yeah, yeah, I know.

Sinon: You two tried to kill each other before?!

Kenshi: Yep. We used to be enemies before we became friends like now. She's really strong so she easily beat me and my friends but somehow, we managed to defeat her in most of the fights, I think. I still remember that time when Sawa got shot by her own attack. Ah, memories.

Queen: Don't remind me that.

Sinon: You two sure got some history, huh?

Queen: Yeah... You probably don't understand what we're talking about, right?

Sinon: Of course I don't understand.

Queen: I'll tell you all about it someday.

Sinon: Fine. Hey, Kenshi. About Death Gun, he was a member of this Laughing Coffin that you fought?

Kenshi: That's right.

Sinon then sat up.

Sinon: Tell me one thing... Those memories... How did you... How did you two overcome them? How did you two conquer your past? How can you guys be so strong now?

Me and Sawa looked at each other before facing Sinon.

Kenshi: I haven't overcome them.

Queen: Same here.

Sinon: Huh?

Queen: Every night after I returned to the real world, I keep dreaming about those people who were killed by my hands and I can barely sleep. Their faces the moment they dead... Their voices... Their words... I'll probably never be able to forget them again.

Sinon: No way... Then... What should I do? I...

Kenshi: But you know what, Sinon? That's probably how it should be. I should have embraced, and never stopped contemplating the significance, the weight, of having killed them with my own hands. That would be the least I could do to make amends... That's how I see it now.

Sinon: Embrace, and never stop contemplating it...

She laid on my lap again. And this time, Sawa leaned her head on my shoulder.

Sinon: Death Gun...

Kenshi: Hm?

Sinon: So inside that ragged cloak is an actual, real person, right?

Kenshi: Yeah... Once I know what his name was during SAO, I should be able to figure out his real name and address in the real world. That's what I came to this world for.

Queen: I see...

Sinon: So that guy couldn't forget what happened in SAO, and got the urge to PK again... that's why he came to GGO?