delinquent

chapter fourteen

Moe

"I've always love Heather, that's the truth but i am not that desperate to have her anymore."

Noah told me, my hands turned into fists as i could feel them pigment from how hard i my hands are formed into.

"But i wouldn't be afraid to take her back whenever you act like complete bullshit."

I never loved him, i don't think he did mine too. It felt like our relationship was just pretentious to one another, something behind that needed to be unfold.

"What do you mean by desperate to have her, huh?"

My hands inside my pocket, still turned into fists waiting for him to snap me out so i can have a better reason to break his face.

"If you love Heather this entire time, then why did you dated me."

My teeth rubbing against each other as my jaw clenched.

"You did too right?"

Noah told me.

"I don't wanna get too far with this, i am just giving you a heads up that i am still waiting for you to fuck up."

"Just say you want to fuck Heather and go, but you're never having her ever.."

I snapped at him, my fist escaping my pockets stopping right when i was about to hit him.

"Do it."

His voice stern as he did so.

Our eyes started to lit fire against each other and our stares could cut.

"I am not scared, go ahead and punch me that's what you're good at anyways right?"

"Your anger gets the best of you, it's stupid."

He bit his bottom lip.

"fuck you.."

With all my chest i told him, i turned around and went back to the cabin not noticing the tears falling down my face slowly, i tried to hold them back, didn't made anything better.

I took my bag and opened a packet filled with white substance, on the table i quickly rolled a paper into a cigarette form and lined up the substance, slowly sliding the rolled paper while i inhaled it slowly feeling the euphoria.

The chances of me getting caught were slim, the thought of it thrills me and it made me want to do it more. My entire head was a mess as i experience another panic attack for the second time this week. I hated to admit how he was right, but what am i supposed to do? How am i going to be honest with Heather?

I was too quick, i knew i should've known better. I didn't want her to get attached neither do i.

My hands landed on my face as i sat down on my bed, i wanted to be honest with her but i am afraid i didn't want her to get involved with my brother's business and I myself have been struggling with it for so long.

I can't just promise her anything knowing i could be gone any day, but i wanted her to know that it's always been her.

My eyes started to drift away, Heather was the last thing in my head. I treated her like shit just because i am afraid, but it's a choice I had to make in the end anyway.

"Jesus Moe i've been looking all over for you!"

Lucy barged in, i quickly jumped out and hid the evidence of the illegal substance behind me.

"Heather is missing, and Noah is looking for her in the woods."

Heather..

My eyes landed on her flashlight, so i took it and ran to where everyone is. Surprised to see everyone looking for Heather, my chest started to rise as i held the flashlight running to nowhere.