Its six am, I couldnt sleep tonight, the dreams are getting worse,she left me because of the screaming I was doing last night. I wish I could do better for her, but when you havent slept in damn near two months its hard to be patient, i have another doctors visit set up for tomorow, maybe it will help. I have been dreaming about murdering everyone and myself, well that is a different story, suicide is something ive thought about for years. Ill write more as it happens.
