𝟏𝟕 𝐘𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐧a𝐧𝐭 | ᴏʟɪᴠᴇʀ ᴍᴏʏ

🫧 ✶⋆⊰ 𝟎𝟏𝟎 ⊱꙳⚘ 🍼

10. [I know I can be the strong person I always wanted to be :)]
ꕤ┈┈┈•┈┈┈•┈┈┈ꕤ┈┈┈•┈┈┈•┈┈┈ꕤ

I woke up quite late from what I saw, I saw the time on my watch and it was already pointing to noon, weird since no one woke me up.

The week has been tense, since my mom found out I'm pregnant, she doesn't talk to me properly, only in the presence of my dad, pretending that everything is fine.

I thought she was going to tell my dad as soon as she found out, but so far she's been silent, I'm ready to tell him anytime, I have to and that moment is today, maybe, today is Sunday, Sundays here at home are always quiet and we spend the day eating, talking, planning things.

How about planning what the baby's room will be like at the grandparents' house?

I smiled thinking about all of this as I walked downstairs to the dining room, I'm sure my dad is sitting reading the paper while my mom prepares lunch in the kitchen. Said and right, I went and kissed the top of my dad's head, so to my mom I just said "Good morning mom" and sat in one of the chairs while answering Oliver's texts.

He's been texting me since early and I haven't replied to any, he must be angry or worried.

While we ate and talked, I asked my dad about the surprise he had for us and he said he can only talk when everything is ready, but I will like it.

Whoever my dad thinks "I'm going to like it" I just don't like it at all, a few years ago he bought me some clothes and said I would like it, but I hated it because they weren't my style, but as they are a gift from him, I wear them, even though I hate them, I don't like to see my father sad or disappointed, thinking he doesn't do anything for me, because he's not so present, I understand, this job demands that from him.

He told me everything that happened during his trip to Florida, how was their relationship with his colleagues, since they are not part of his group, they were new colleagues that he only met there, it was a good experience for him.

My mother, on the other hand, was looking at me throughout lunch, it was a disappointed look, a sad look, that was hurting me, and I was afraid to talk to my dad, even more alone.

I will have to wait until tomorrow to be able to tell him, and I don't even know how to do it, I'm sure that when I talk I won't contain myself and I'll cry, I won't be able to speak, so I'll have to find a way to tell him without being the one saying, how about a little box saying "congratulations, you're going to be a grandpa" and a picture of the ultrasound?

I got up from the table, I made coffee for my parents and went back to my room, my mom doesn't want me to touch anything, actually she never liked me touching things, but I need to learn, I'm going to be a housewife one day, talking about being a housewife, and if my parents really throw me out of the house, what am I going to do, what will become of me? Never thought about it, I'm fucked.

We finished eating, I took the dishes and put them to wash, my mom did the rest and then we all sat in the living room to watch something on TV, I missed those family moments, I'm almost always with Oliver and his friends, who are also my friends, they are my only friends so to speak. In high school I have a few that I can still call friends, but better say classmates.

My dad has been here for a week and this is the first time we've met in the living room after so long, my dad is very busy, my mom too, but she always takes time for me and it seems like she is not so busy, she's always with the phone by her side, and anytime calls me to see if I'm okay, if I've eaten, where I am, what I'm doing, she always asks if I'm okay, and this mini separation is being difficult, We haven't spoken, it's been a while since I heard her voice on the phone and I miss it.

Classes start soon, terror is coming, I don't miss school, and luckily this is my last year there. School is a place where we learn many things, lessons, we learn almost everything there, but it's a place that also destroys a lot of people, school brings depression, school oppresses, but all these feelings don't come from school at all, they come from those who go to school, it's our "classmates" who bring this hurt with each other, people destroy other people's futures inside the school, the school is the place that prepares us for the future, and the people there are able to write your future because of their attitudes.

I was never bullied in high school, nobody messed with me there, because I don't give people time to hurt me, and I never gave any reason to, but with this baby inside me I feel bad knowing that maybe some people don't will be able to react well, even those who don't know about my existence can find out, and I can suffer from it, I know, but I'm strong and nothing, no one knocks me down, no one will step on me, no one in that school will be able to look at me with disdain 'cause I won't bow my head to them, I'll never turn my face away lest they look at me, I'll walk with my head held high and my hand on my belly 'cause I'm Rebecca Johnson.

After I posted that photo, I received hate messages, messages wishing me and my child harm, I cried reading that, I suffered reading that, but who are these people, they can say what they want, it's their right, they can say anything and everything, nothing will change the fact that me and Oliver become parents, nothing they say will change my future, hating me will not change who I am and who I will become.