𝐒𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐮𝐬 𝐒𝐧𝐚𝐩𝐞 𝐎𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐬

➳ 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬

It took you 23 seconds. 23 seconds to ruin the golden bond of friendship you had with the potions master, 23 seconds for him to walk away from you like he had seen a ghost. 23 seconds to make a confession you could never, ever take back. 23 seconds to lose a friend, an ally, a love.

You sulked as Dumbledore talked about the upcoming mission in the morning briefing. You were sitting opposite to him, yet you didn't dare to look at him. Not after the embarrassment you had caused yourself last night. Not after the loss you had experienced, a little event that had chipped at your heart with a little knife. Okay, a dagger. No. A chainsaw. You had tried covering up the eyebags and your red-rimmed eyes, but no matter how hard you had tried, the order sure knew something was wrong. But they knew better than to linger.

Severus watched you squirm in your seat, his heart heavier than an anchor holding a large ship in place. Oh, how he wished he could give you what you most desired. He maintained his neutrality, but his aura reeked of the anguish he truly felt.

"Crucial mission, guys, so don't mess up," you heard Alastor Moody say, concluding the meeting. You groaned internally when you realized who you'd be spending time with. No one knew of the little hiccup that had occurred last night between you and Severus, so you both remained partners.

"That's what you say for every mission, Moody," Sirius' teasing voice rang, eliciting a few scattered laughs. Alastor could only glare at his quip before leaving the room to make last-minute arrangements.

You stayed as far as you could from Severus. The unfortunate events from last night flashed in your head every time you simply took a whiff of his musky scent.

"I.." you breathed, looking at your shoes. You didn't know how to tell him. Even after months of preparation for this moment, you stood bewildered in front of the man, stuttering and stumbling through your words. You held onto his hands tight. You had to do this.

He stared at you, his mind still processing the warmth that radiated off your fingers when you held his hands. He was still wary of physical touch, but not with you. You had reached out to him almost as if you needed support. He clasped his fingers softly against yours, squeezing lightly—a gesture to tell you that he was there for you. That he would listen, no matter what. He had rather taken a fancy for you recently, but he wouldn't admit it. He knew how you deserved better; he knew how he could never give you that. Not after all he had done.

"I.." you tried again. Breathing deeply, you started. "I have a... confession," you whispered, pausing to brace yourself. This was it. "I'm afraid I have acquired... a certain fondness... for you lately," you said, shutting your eyes closed tight. You didn't want to see his expression. Your heart was beating a mile a minute. "And I was hoping that by confessing, I could perhaps... court you... if it would suit you," your voice seemed to lower as you divulged your sweet secret to him.

You waited for him to acknowledge your confession. You could feel his fingers go cold by the second. Your heart beat faster. Was this a mistake? Were you going to lose him, once and for all?

You cracked your eyes open to meet his onyx ones. You could sink right into them, and forget your own name. Your mind registered at how his eyes had widened, his mouth moving but no words coming out, before he completely shut off all expression, his face a cold mask. Your heart sank.

Severus tried to even his breathing. You wanted to court him. It was a tradition for men to initiate the courting, and for women to accept the delightful proposal. But with you, it was always different. But he knew better. He couldn't let you get close to him. You were already dear in his heart, and that worried him every minute of every day. His heart wouldn't take it if something happened to you, and he'd feel worse if he was the reason for it.