forgive me. dotae ✔️

2

part 2.

t/w: mentions of alcohol and excessive drinking/slight sexual assault
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"taeyong-ie! wanna watch a movie with me?"

doyoung called out into the nct127 dorm room as he got back from the SM ent. building after a long day of working in the studio.

he expected his adorable boyfie to come running and jump into his arms or scare him from behind then pull him into a warm backhug, as part of their daily routine.

but it seemed today the dorm was quieter than usual. although all of the members were still in the studio recording their individual parts, doyoung was sure that taeyong had half the day off and would be at home.

"strange I thought he was home, where is he?" Doyoung asked himself as he took off his shoes and socks, walking into the dorm room that he and taeyong shared.

Sitting on his bed was a note, which he scrambled to pick up, recognising the all too familiar scribbled handwriting in hangul, the same that had sent him love letters just a week before during national boyfriend "week" as taeyong had insisted.

"young-ah, I'm headed to my parents' house tonight to visit them, i won't be back till night time, don't wait up for me, I promise I'll come back to you in one piece, love you <3"

doyoung blushed at the last line, muttering "cheesy" under his breath and folding the note back up delicately, before slipping it into his box comprising of all the notes and letters taeyong has ever sent him. he loved that box and sometimes took out all the letters to reread when he missed taeyong.

he looked around the empty room with a sigh, letting the sudden feeling of loneliness and emptiness consume his emotions.

after a refreshing shower and his night-time skin care routine, he layed down onto his bed and put on a movie on his mini projector that he had originally intended to watch with taeyong.

despite him not being here, doyoung hugged one of his pillows after changing into one of his favourite hoodies, deciding that the scent of the leader would have to satisfy him for now, assuring himself that when he woke up the next morning taeyong would be cuddled up next to him.

oh boy was he wrong.
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switch pov.
|taeyong's pov|

"YONGGG glad you could make it man"
taeyong's friend shouted across the loud bar packed with drunk and sober people, all squeezed against each other, some looked like they were intoxicated beyond the help of a simple orange juice shot to sober them up.

"jeez it's only 9pm" taeyong chuckled under his breath, greeting his long-time no see friend. in an environment like this, though it seemed like an unlikely place where someone would recognise him, taeyong didn't take any chances and accessorised his full black outfit with a black cap and mask to cover his face.

taeyong was immediately handed a red solo cup with a mysterious liquid, he sniffed it and immediately coughed at the strong scent of vodka

"jesus, did you have to start me off with a vodka, are you trying to get me drunk" he shouted over the sound of the dj booth blasting at full volume.

his friend only snickered and poured more into his cup, throwing up a peace sign and yelling "BOTTOMS UP" before disappearing into the crowd, making a beeline for a group of girls that were eyeing them from the corner.

taeyong took a small sip of the vodka, hissing at the way it burned his throat, but as the night went on, he slowly got used to the taste and scent of alcohol, eventually making his way to almost 10 shots. At his eleventh shot, he felt himself starting to feel slightly tipsy, as a result of tolerance built up from years of drinking frequently.

he set his cup down as doyoung's warnings from before rang in his head once again, thinking of the time he was once stopped by doyoung from downing a whole bottle of beer in one go after a stressful performance

"baby you're better than this, alcohol isn't good for you, I know you can quit, I'm here for you. I love you"

unknowingly, he smiles at the memory and whispered to himself as if doyoung was right in front of him "I love you too bubs"

He headed off to find his friend, intending to leave knowing that his love was waiting for him back in the dorm, only to see him dancing drunkenly with a bunch of girls, looking as if he was having the time of his life.

when he saw taeyong, he pulled him by the elbow into the group of girls who immediately surrounded him and one girl tried to grind on him.

Taeyong jumped up in surprise and was about to squeeze his way out of the group before his friend yelled to him "yo yong! have some fun man, all these girls wanna hang with us, loosen up!"

before he could say anything, he was handed a cup with a brownish liquid inside before being motioned to drink it by one of the girls with a sly smirk on her face. She made her way closer to him, pushing her body against his and forced his hand to bring the cup up to his lips.

as a result, taeyong took a large gulp of the liquid, almost choking on the sting of it on the back of his throat. based on the taste, he recognised it as the infamous highest alcohol percentage drink in the bar, absinthe.

in a second, taeyong could feel his head become light as he started to feel his limbs loosen up in their movements. One hand moving to rest on the girl's hip, as a smirk slips it's way to rest on his face, moving closer to her.

all warning signs or awareness of his surroundings were gone at that moment, all taeyong could comprehend was the loud music coming from the speakers and the girl in front of him.

swaying their hips to the music, taeyong felt himself slowly slip away from reality as his judgement became tainted by the affect of alcohol in his system. Everything seemed to go wrong as he felt himself placing his lips on the girl's and she kissed back, as feverishly as he had seen some of the other pairs in the room did.

In the distance, he heard his friend hollering and shouting in excitement for his "breakthrough", as if the roughness and over stimulation of it all had brought him back to his senses, taeyong abruptly stopped moving his lips against hers as it started to trail down her neck, where light purple blue black marks had started to form.

His eyes widened at the sight and the only thing he saw before bolting out of there was the shocked sight of the girl in front of him at the abrupt loss of contact, and his friend pulling another one of the girls towards the back with a devilish look in his eyes.

Without bothering to catch up with his friend to say goodbye, taeyong ran out of the bar with the girl yelling after him to stay.

The only thing on his mind now, as it slowly cleared from the fog of the past half hour under the influenced of heavy alcohol, the look on doyoung's face when he stepped into the dorm with lipstick stains all over his face and neck.

his eyes begin to water as he struggled to walk down the sidewalk in a straight line, eventually collapsing at a nearby bench, feeling more lonely than he had ever been the whole night. He rubbed at his eyes tiredly and checked his phone which surprisingly was still on him, and was shocked at the bright 2am showing on the screen.

Right as his battery died, taeyong felt tears roll down his cheeks as he thought of the night's events. Despite wanting to leave after two hours of light drinking to return to his lover's side to retire for the night, he ended up cheating on his beloved doyoung, who was sound asleep at home with a soft smile on his face thinking of the morning where he would be next to his yong-ie, and everything was gonna be okay.

He went to a nearby convenience store to wash up before slowly trudging back to the dorm, which thankfully wasnt too far away from the bar.

tears rolled down his face constantly, only getting heavier as he came nearer to the dorm. the weight of his guilt crushing him from the inside out.

he whispered under his breath, into the crisp night air of autumn, hoping that somehow the sincerity of it all would erase the memory of his guilt,
"forgive me doyoung-ah"
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end of part 2.

y'all I can't believe I wrote this, 1490+ words, oh gosh, btw not proofread yet!
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