forgive me. dotae ✔️

6

part 6.

"y-yongie, it's m-me"

in an instant, taeyong recognised the soft raspy voice that echoed through the empty room.

he tried to sit up, however slightly weak from the lack of getting up, eating or sleeping on a regular basis. As he tried to push himself up on his elbows, he felt gentle pushes on his shoulders, guiding him to lie back down on the mattress, which he flopped onto with a sigh, frustrated by the contrast between his desire to move and weakness in his limbs.

"lie down yong-ah, it's okay. It's okay." Doyoung repeated gently, sweeping the falling hair out of the leader's face, finally taking in the full sight of the toll that the seperation had on him.

Taeyong's eyes were highlighted by heavy eyebags, his pupils were dilated in clear exhaustion but blown-wide in surprise at the person in front of him, his hair completely messy, pointing up at some parts as if the leader had pulled on them constantly.

Doyoung felt a strike of pity and slight guilt, finally understanding just how badly the leader was affected by their seperation, despite it only being three days. The members' earlier voiced out worries were definitely an understatement.

Never has the boy wanted to hug his lover so badly, just to pull him into his arms and share his warmth, comfort him, and assure him that they were okay.

And so he did just that.

Despite being so desperately tired, taeyong couldn't allow himself to fall asleep at this moment, suddenly overcome by an urge of calmness, although he still wasn't sure where they stood, just having him here was enough for him to feel safe and sleepy for the first time in days. He fought against every instinct to pull his eyelids closed, fighting against the urge to fall asleep right there and then, unable to take his eyes brimming with tears off his lover slightly frowning with worry at him.

There was so much to say, so much to clear up, so much to discuss and go through together.

The pain.
The lies.
The cheating.
The betrayal.
The future for them.

But at that moment, doyoung wrapped his arms around taeyong, slowly laying down next to him, pulling him towards his chest. Placing a small kiss on the leader's forehead, he adjusted them to make him comfortable, covering them with a duvet, and caressed taeyong's cheek endearingly.

He whispered, as comfortingly and as warmly as he could, "sleep. It's okay, I'm okay, we can settle this later, I love you"

At that moment, taeyong felt what others call deja vu, recalling the days when his bunny would lull him to sleep, recalling the times when the three words of affirmation and care, whispered so gently, paired along with soft kisses all over his face weren't so complicated.

Suddenly, he found a new strength, and a new wave of energy rubbed all traces of sleep from his tired out mind. He blinked several times and said with great effort, "no"

Doyoung looked at him, his stare mixed with worry, confusion and sadness all in one, before he could open his mouth to utter a single word, taeyong had beat him to it.

"no. no. listen to me, just... listen to me this one time."

the leader sighed once before letting everything out.

"I cheated on you that day I told you I was going to my parents' place for the night, and I've been beating myself up for it ever since. I felt like I've disappointed you, and I've done so much wrong that nothing could ever, ever ever fix it. I know that nothing I can do will ever make up for the pain I've caused you"

A single tear.

"I'm so so so sorry, no amount of apologies could ever change me or rid me of my wrongdoing. I've b-betrayed you, and everything that you've done for me, I'm sorry for being so stupid. Although it's still my fault, you deserve to know that actually happened. That night, I wanted to leave at 10 after having a few drinks, I didn't want to stay long, my friend had called me out for just a drink or two to celebrate our comeback, or so he says. Somehow I got dragged into this group of girls, and one of them handed me a drink, t-then she p-pushed herself o-onto me... "

Taeyong's recount was briefly interrupted as he tried to choke back a sob, recalling the traumatic events of the night. He felt the arms around him squeeze him softly, as if encouraging him to go on.

He took a deep breath and continued with his face buried in doyoung's chest, unable to look at him.

"I swear it was a kiss and that's it, I didn't do anything with her, I didn't know how strong the drink was, she just f-forced me to drink it, I'm s-sorry, I'm so so sorry doyoung-ah. I don't deserve you, I'm a horrible horrible person-"

Taeyong felt a gentle hand pulling his chin up to look into his lover's eyes shining with tears. As his own tears coursed down his cheeks, he felt lips against his in a swift motion, allowing himself to fall against doyoung's going limp in his arms, as his touch starved emotional wall completely collapsed.

He felt a hand go behind his neck, holding him softly by the nape to support him, as even gentler hands cupped his face, wiping the tears from it.

As they parted, their foreheads still against one another, doyoung chuckled sadly and said in a gentle but firm manner "lee taeyong. No matter what happens, no matter how far apart we are, as long as we always come back here and meet in the middle, we'll be just fine. No matter what, I'll love you, even if you don't love me anymore I'll wait for you to come back to me. Which I think isn't the case here... right?" He ended off in a playful tone, wiping his own tears out of his face, laughing softly at the leader's aggressive head shaking as taeyong choked out a quiet "I love you too".

In the comfortable silence they stayed that way, with taeyong wrapped up in doyoung's arms, getting peppered with kisses all over his face. As his eyes started getting heavy again, he felt a soft kiss on each of his eyelids, the last thing he heard before falling asleep comfortably for the first time in god knows how long: "I'll be here when you wake up, I'll always be here. I forgive you."

part 6 end.

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hiii how are you? :)) thank you for all the support so far, next chapter will most probably be the ending! Then I might follow up with an epilogue chapter later on if y'all want, do comment your thoughts and ideas, I love reading them! :))

luv y'all :)