/𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐒\ [𝒔. 𝒃𝒍𝒂𝒄𝒌]

𝟓.𝟡.𝟣

"moral indignation is jealousy with a halo." ~ H.G. Wells

~march 1976~

It was late at night when Artemis stumbled back from Professor Bones's office, half-drunk, his smell still lingering on her skin and clothes. She carefully crept into the common room and let out a little sigh of relief when she found it empty. She knew she looked a mess and she didn't want any awkward questions from anybody in her house. She pushed down the thought that she was mostly worried about Sirius seeing her like this. Artemis knew he wouldn't let it go if he did, even if they were fighting.

She slipped her shoes off and carried them up the stairs to her dormitory, inching the door open so as not to wake up any of the girls. When she stepped inside, however, none of them were asleep. Mary, Lily, and Marlene were all crouched together in the alcove, a pack of cigarettes and an ashtray between them, obviously up late talking. They all looked up when Artemis stepped inside. "Hey," said Marlene, and Artemis instantly knew she knew about Bones. It was something in her expression and the loftiness of her voice, something to do with the way her eyes took stock of Artemis's clothes, her undone hair, her smeared makeup. "Come and talk to us a second."

"Can I get a shower first?" Artemis had the same feeling in her chest that she used to get when her mother was mad at her for something.

Lily took a drag from her cigarette. "Yeah, we just want to talk to you when you're done."

Artemis nodded and slipped into the bathroom. She tossed her jacket on the floor and peeled off her short dress, heaping all of her clothes in a pile and avoiding looking at them. It felt too wrong, too disgusting now that she was back in the common room. She didn't want to think of Bones's hands on her skin or his lips on hers anymore. It was satisfying in the moment, but the moment it was over she wished she could shove it from her mind and forget it happened.

The hot water felt scalding and perfect on Artemis's skin, like it was burning away any remnants of that night. Like she was washing Bones off of herself. When she stepped out of the shower and got dressed in sweatpants and an extra large t-shirt she'd stolen from James over the summer, she stared at herself in the mirror. A few dark traces of makeup remained below her eyes and her wet hair soaked through the fabric of her shirt, chilling her to the bone. She looked small, almost childish standing there in clothes too big and eyes too wide. It reminded her of when she used to wear nothing but her dad's old clothes around the school. She'd been such a dumb kid, but she sort of missed those days, when breaking the dress code was the most risky thing she could think to do.

Artemis joined the rest of the girls in the alcove and lit herself a cigarette. "So, what're you all doing up?"

"We were going to ask you the same question," Mary said softly. "Artie..."

"Don't call me that," Artemis said sharply. Now it really did feel like she was talking to her mother.

Lily interjected, keeping them all focused. "Art, Mary saw you going into Bones's office earlier tonight."