IN YOUR DREAMS...

ch 19:A yes or a no?

      Goodbyes always hurt,but this goodbye will be the most happiest goodbye to ever exist.It will lead me to a better "hello",a more realistic one with the same person I love!
      As I was fully immersed in this mess,I forgot to write my diary.I took out a pen and started writing it.
 

Dear Shane,
        I decided to run to 'forever' with you!I thought we could hold hands and run to 'forever',together.Finally,I'll be able to meet you in real life.The one thing I've ever wanted.Seems like Santa heard my wish before I could say him.I'm sorry Shawn,I didn't know that I was the one behind all your sufferings.
    I've heard everyone say,"Lets meet in our dreams".But Shane,"Lets meet in our reality".And I promise to love you till forever.
       
        I was sitting on my bed thinking hard whether I should go to school or not!!!Should I go?
    Yes I should.I have to tell Shawn about my feelings for him.I have to tell him that I'm not in love with him.
I quickly got ready for school,packed my bags and took a final glance in the mirror.I placed the pendant safely inside the cupboard and locked it.
     I called out to my cheerfully."Mom,I'm going for school".
    Mom stopped me."Have you gotten him out of your dreams?"
   "How can I?I don't feel sleepy at all! I'll do it tonight.",I said with a thumbs up.
   "Jade-",she came closer with a concerned look."Are you going to school?"
  "Yes.Why?",I  was surprised by her question.
   "Who do you love?The one in dreams or the one in real life?",she asked.
  "The one in my dreams,uhm,It's Shane."
   "Then what are you gonna do with the real life person?"
  "Don't worry,Mom.I'll handle it.",I winked at her and left.
    Ann passed by me staring right into my eyes.I could feel the fire in her eyes. I hugged and kissed her on the forehead.And she pretended to vomit after I kissed her.Just sibling things!!
    "I'm sorry Ann.I'll buy you a new one".I smiled with a puppy eyes.
   "That's okay.I don't need one!",she turned her face and walked away.
  I bit my lip,staring at her.She sat on the dinner table and started to dress her bread with butter.I turned my head and walked away!
   Carrying my heavy bag,I stepped out of the house.I saw some students hurrying and getting into thier vans and cars. School-mornings have always been busy.
     I crossed the bridge and looked for the puppy.It has been a while since I came here.I was so busy with school and the work at the coffee shop.
  'Someone must have adopted the puppy'.I thought to myself.
    Today I decided to take the country route inside of travelling in busy city noise.I had a plenty of time,so it would not matter if I go to school in a longer route.
    I was waiting for the bus,sitting on a seat looking at the passerbys.Then I saw an old woman holding a stick in one hand and a heavy shopping bag on the other,walking in front of me.I felt,she was  having difficulty to carry those heavy bags.I moved towards her and helped her carry the bag upto the end of the road.She gave me a pleasant smile and muttered,"Thank you".
   Finally I boarded a bus,this passes through the country roads and reaches the city through another route.As the bus was riding through the country roads,The scent of honeysuckle was in the air.A humming bird was dipping its long beak into the blossoms on the bushes.I looked toward the pasture at the side of a house where a milch cow was grazing contentedly.The windmill at a distance creaked;the hogs rooted in the pen beside the barn;a chicken wandered to the edge of the porch,flapped its wings and pecked at something on the ground.
     As the city started to show up.I got down from the bus and walked towards the school.While crossing the park on my way,I saw two lovely squirrels,fighting over a nut then running after each other.
    I slowly walked towards the school with a smile.
     My class was filled with sounds of laughter and whispers.I found Shawn in his seat,staring at the river outside the window.
     "Will you be free today?",I leaned closer to him.
  "Don't talk to me.I'm mad at you",he turned his face away.
   I went to the other side and looked at him."Why are you mad at me?"
   "Why did you run away suddenly,yesterday?",he looked at me innocently.
   "Uh,I had an important work.I remembered it.So,I had to go!",I tried my best in lying.
    He believed it!!
"My mom made special snacks for us,you missed it.She was so happy when you came home!"
   "Uh,Don't worry.Anyways my rest of my life will be spent in your house only",I smiled.
  "What?"
"Nothing",I winked and eased myself on a small chair.
    "Lets go to the bridge after school",I said.
  "Why?",he smiled.
"Do you want to hear my answer or not?".I raised my brows giving him a smirk.
  "Ofcourse.I want to!",he jumped from his seat.
   "Don't get too excited.It might also be something you don't want to hear!"
   He sat down in silence looking at me with a pout.
    This is why Its said that you shouldn't let your tongue run out of control when you're happy.
   I looked at him one last time and started to concentrate on my classes.
     When I look at Shawn.It feels like I'm  looking at me.I know how he would feel,if I give him a 'no'!
    I was completely broken when my friends left me and when Jake rejected me!But the sad thing was,both happened on the same day . I'll try my best to convince Shawn and make him understand that he's still my close friend whom I rely upon the most!!