Life as I know it

The message the he'll never get to see

It all happened to fast

In just a matter of second you were gone

Taking along with you everything

All the memories

All the laughs

You took a part of me

You left me

Alone up against my worst enemy    

You didn't look back

You don't care

Because you have better things to do

You had other people to talk to

you didn't care bout me

And if you did

You had a horrible way of showing it

You were the douche guy 

The one everyone loved 

But that I hated

You acted liked you didn't care

About me

Even about yourself

Can't you see that I need you

You are one of my pillars

And probably the one I care about the most

I may never be able to admit it

But I know it deep in my heart 

I will always love you 

As a friend

And so much more

I can't even explain how much you mean to me

You are my best friend

I want you to know everything about me

I want to tell you every single little thought that runs through my brain 

I want you to be the first person I turn to when somethings wrong

I want you to be my walking diary

And in a way you already are

But what you don't know 

I've held back

I want to be able to text you at 2 am 

You answer and we have a long convo until one of us falls asleep

I want to do so many things 

But i'll never get to do them

Or have the courage to do them

Since this is the message that you'll never see

I just wanna take the time to say

I love you

More then a friend

More then you could ever imagine

But i know that will never ever happen

And I have accepted that

But I need you

I want you

I can not lose you

Or else I might also lose myself in the process

You may not know these things

And you never will

Because this is the message

You'll never get to see

_________________________________________________

Once again never sure what I'm suppose to say about that things I write so I hope

Those who took the time to read it can help me 

Thanks in advance those who did take the time to say some thing

Luvalwayz Zabuja<3