Insta-stalker

Finding out

The whole day all I could think about is, what if Kenley is the account and what if she isn't and what if the plan doesn't actually work and there is still a kink in it that I haven't noticed or figured out yet.

I was a ball of nervousness and was about to have a panic attack.

Once again it came down to my last class and I was about ready to scream the last five-ten minutes of it.

I paced around the room waiting for the bell to ring and when it did I ran.

I ran so fast that I was actually the first one in the bus.

I am never the first one so it was pretty amazing.

I sat in my seat waiting nervously.

What was I waiting for?

More like who am I waiting for.

I needed Kenley on the bus so we could talk more about the fake plans I had told her about.

I hoped she believed that they were real plans and we were actually going to do the things I told her about.

Almost everyone had gotten on the bus only moments after I got on, but still no sign of Kenley.

I was starting to wonder if she left school because she was sick.

It maybe she ditched so she could get that suspension she wanted.

Or maybe she got expelled like she wanted!

I wouldn't have cared less about why she wasn't on any other day, but today was the big day.

Today is the day that could end the extra stresses I've had lately and ease the depression a bit.

The bus engine began to hum just then and we began to pull away.

I stared at the school frustrated, confused, scared, worried, upset, angry, stressed, depressed, surprised, and pretty much every bad feeling rolled into one.

Just as we stopped at the stop sign before turning in the direction of the town over I took a nice long look at the school.

I looked at each and every window scanning the whole building as if looking for something, but what?

I don't even know but I got to the middle row and the window second farthest on the right was different from the rest.

It contained something none of the other widows had.

A shadowy figure.

A person perhaps.

Who is the person?

Kenley.

Kenley was still at the school instead of riding the bus back into our town.

That moment was filled with the feeling of betrayal.

I knew at that moment she knew what was going on.

She knew every secret I had.

She knew that I suspected her of owning the account.

I was right I knew I had to be right now.

The rest of the ride was miserable and everything was droned out my a buzzing in my ears.

The buzzing you hear when ur at a funeral for someone you loved and you have cried too hard.

I was crying not loudly, but a mute cry.

No sniffles, no weeps, no coughs.

It was just the tears.

The tears blurred my vision and I got off the bus and walked home and what seemed like a week.

I was walking slower than a snail.

I wasn't sure what to think or how to feel.

I'm sure people stared and pointed, but who was I to care.

Caring would get me no where just like caring about wether or not Kenley was the account owner.

Caring got me no where except the answer I didn't want to hear.

When I arrived at my house I stood staring at it whispering to myself.

"Why? Why? Why? Why me? Why her? Why not two other people that are complete strangers to each other?"

I fell to my hands and knees and sobbed some more.

I was then lifted my someone.

I am not sure who but they had light hands and a firm grip.

It was an impossible combination, but it is what describes it best.

They aided me to my front door and onto my couch.

I laid down unaware of what was going on.

I was in a daze.

I was brought a cup of hot tea.

I stared at it blankly and said why one last time.

"Why, just why?"

That's when I fell asleep.