THESE FEW CHAPTERS ARE GOING TO BE JUICY.. NO MORE DRY BS..!
I came home after a long, tiring boring day at work. I saw Shrek fast asleep on the couch, nothing unusual. I was planning on going to sleep but then I got a message from someone... this is unusual for sure... I open it its from a unknown number..? I see the message and It says "Hey Ed! It's Roi, your coworker. Wanna go out to dinner tonight??" It's....Roi??
Now Roi is the fidget spinner God, he is always pulling some ritual with them during break at work... he kinda freaks me out. Sometimes he would come at 3 AM exact and pull some satanic ritual saying its a "prank" or "challenge" hes always telling us to stay juicy and to take a bath with blue raspberry flavored jell-o ... yeah not that cool. Hes really loud and stuff like that and hes always saying "IM GONNA QUIT MY JOB AND BE A YOUTUBER" suprisingly he hasnt been fired yet. Now I know hes rich and stuff so....... Maybe I could take advantage of this? Me and shrek are in major debt and its not going well.....
I would respond with a simple "sure....when are we going?" I would start to get ready but i'm kinda skeptical for this... Im trying to stay quiet so i wont wake up master shrek because if i wake him up i wont be here for another day ill say that for sure but anyways i would start to get ready and then i get a call... my soulja boy ringtone going off louder than ariana grandes whistle tones. I check and i have 3 missed calls from Roi... So I call him back. I do my hair and I put my pink skirt that I got from Justice on and he finally responds saying "Hello?" I speak with him and he said hes gonna pick me up. So I put my size 8 high heels on and i put my glasses on and i brush my teeth. I put some makeup on but not too much makeup. After that I take some selfies for the gram and I wait outside. Roi pulls up in his Black 2001 Ford Windstar.
I felt so lavish going into his car. It smelt like dollar store brand air fresheners and used car smell. I get in the front seat. We would speed off. He made some small talk with me and Yeah.......We got stuck in some traffic while going to this resturaunt. He was asking me about if i'm in a releshonship and I didn't really respond. He asked me if I knew a folk named Shrek.. I don't know how to respond to that to be honest so i try my best to change the subject but it ends up being awkward. We finnally get out of traffic and we zoom off downtown. It felt like a fever dream not gonna lie. Then we get there.. ratatoing! Such A Lavish and Expensive resturuant!
Its roughly around 10 pm. Such a long line.. since Roi had a reservation, we didn't have to wait! So I go ahead and I order spaghetti and meatballs with extra noodles and sauce. Then I also order some iced tea with lemon juice. Roi orders the same thing except, no meatballs in his. He told me how he runs a youtube channel but I already knew about it though. So really there was no point of that but he said how he has made such a amazing amount of money its insane. He really does have a lot of money though. I mean... were in ratatoing. Best resturant in the state! I check the time and its 11:37. We wait for our food and make some small talk. Roi says he hasn't been in a serious releshonship in awhile though. He says he wants to fall in "love" again.. but why with...me? Our food comes and we eat it silently. the woman comes to give our check and we leave. we go to the car and we sit there. Roi gets very.. "touchy" with me like he wants something. I look at him with a blank stare... Huh...? "You need anything?" I say..... He grabs my thigh "Woah there buster" I say from shock. "Roi.. Just drive...take me home please" He tells me that itll be a long way home, and that he lives close from here.. "what if i take you to my house" he says. i told him okay..and he takes me to his apartment. when we got there it smelt like nothing. It was kinda clean but there was stuff spread out, i don't think he was ready to take me home today. The clock is at 12:23 am.. he told me everything will be okay. he told me to go to sleep int he guest bedroom and he shows me the guest bedroom. i fell asleep, he went downstairs.
its 3 am and i just woke up from hearing loud noises from the downstairs. i quietly go downstairs to see roi, his camera man and a.. elmo toy?
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Im .. confused???
He sees me and says to his camera man .."..stop recording.." and he comes upstairs. My heart starts beating very fast. He says "whats up, why are you awake?" i tell him that i heard loud noises. He tells me everything is gonna be okay and that were safe. I go back to the guest bedroom and i check my phone to see 60 new text messages from...shrek. i check them and my heart is beating so fast i could power a sports car. He asks where i am if im okay if im alive. I tell him alive and that im at my house. he says "..okay" i go to sleep again to wake up at 7 am. roi is asleep in his forbidden bathtub. i call an uber to come get me and i get my stuff together. i change my outfit to something more... pajama like. the uber comes to get me and i go home..
