Tell me all your deepest secrets

45. And it was all worth it

Hilda

"Oh my god, I really do have my last name there!" I said excited as I jumped to the bed next to Joonas. It was morning and we just woke up.
"Yes you do. Pretty amazing, first time in my life I share my apartment with someone I love the most." Joonas said with his raspy morning voice.
"This is something I never even could dream about. I was so stubborn and boring back then.. why I didn't just told about my feeling right away when I saw I had them." I blaimed myself and buried my face to the pillow. But Joonas just hugged me and lifted my head up.
"It needed more time for you to understand what you were feeling. Better later than never." He said and it made me feel better.
"You're right. Think about it, that I would be at New York right now. Crying after you." I said and studied his face.
"I can't think about it. I'm sure that I would've come after you no matter what." He said and placed a kiss to my head.
"That's why I love you." I smiled.
After we ate the breakfast, we decided to go for a walk to a park.
We walked holding hands, the sun was shining and it was very beautiful winter day.

A small family walked past us, that couple had a baby in a stroller and a small dog walked next to it.
That couple looked so happy. I smiled by myself when I saw them.
"That could have been us.. someday.." I said quietly, he turned his head to look at me, but I just looked where we were going.
"Do you think about it often?" He asked.
"Sometimes. Did I do the wrong decision?" I asked and stopped, Joonas looked worried.
"Maybe it happened because it wasn't meant to be right now. I think that all things happens for a reason." He said and stroked my sides.
"That is so cliché." I sighed.
"Maybe it is, but the most important thing is to think about future. Think about us, you never know when you're walking down the aisle in a white wedding dress. We have our own summer cottage and what else?" Joonas said and it made me smile. He's the one. The one who makes me smile, and that's everything I need from a guy.
"You're already thinking our possible weddings?" I asked and he smiled too.
"It depends on you, do you want to get married some day in the future?" He asked.
"Some day.. yes. Especially with you." I said and he kissed me.

"You know what?" He asked and took his phone from his pocket.
"What?" I asked.
"I think it's time to publish our relationship. Come here." He placed his hand to my shoulders and pushed me close to him.
"Are you sure?" I asked hesitating.
He didn't answer, but lifted his phone up and I buried my face against his jacket, but you still saw half of my face from that picture.
"That's perfect." He said and published it to his instagram. Caption was "She <3"
It made me smile.
"Your fans are going to explode." I chuckled as he put the phone back to his pocket. He didn't put my instagram account in the picture, that's only good. My profile is private anyways and I don't want to get hundreds of people who wants to follow me.
"I don't care. The importantest thing is that we are happy, and together." He said and we continued walking again.
Joonas needed to visit the rehearsal place, he left something there yesterday.

"Where the fuck is it..?" He mumbled and looked everywhere and almost crawled on the floor, trying to find something.
"What are you actually looking for?" I asked while I sat on the couch.
"Hah! Found it!" He shouted as he stood up from under some table.
He took a seat next to me and showed me a pink plectrum what he hold in his fingers.
"Hello kitty huh?" I chuckled.
"Yeah, it's cool isn't it?" He grinned and then took an black acoustic guitar.
"What you want us to sing?" He asked while he tuned the guitar. I stayed silent for a moment, thinking what we should sing.
"Sharks love blood, acoustic version." I said and Joonas nodded.
He started singing first.

"You jump, I jump
We're gonna be alright 'cause
We've got mad love burning deep inside of us"

Then I joined him, we both sang. Our voices harmonized maybe too perfect together.

"From the very start you had my heart
You like them bad, and I like them crazy
I love you hard like sharks love blood
Like sharks love blood
Like sharks love blood

Tell me all your deepest secrets
I can show you mine
Take me down the darkest trenches
Darling, I don't mind"

Then we just stared at each other, in silence. I just can't tell in words how much I love that man. Not any words can describe that. And I hope that our love is bullet proof, and we will stay together, no matter what.
No one can come between us. I just know it.
"I love you Hilda." He suddenly said, breaking the silence.
"I love you even more." I said and took his hand.
"When I look at your eyes, I feel like I'm home." I continued and he started to smile.
"And everytime when I play this song, I will think about you. From the very start you really had my heart, and you told me all your deepest secrets, it was hard for you to open up, but still you did it." He said and it made me almost cry.
"And it was all worth it. You broke my walls which I had created around me, and I couldn't be more happy about it." I smiled to him.
Then we kissed. A perfect, long and loving kiss.
After the kiss we pressed our foreheads together, and we both smiled.

I told him all my deepest secrets. It wasn't easy, but he cared enough to have my trust.
That's why I love him.
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Author's note:
THANK YOU!🖤
This was amazing journey to write this story, and I got so suprised about how many readers there is.
Writing is very important thing to me, it makes me happy and it's very therapeutic. I love all the comments you have written, they made me smile and I'm so thankful for all of you, who have been reading this story, leaving votes and comments🥰
I have another story which I have been writing for few days.
I will release the first chapter at next week, 16.11. on tuesday!
Thank you for once more, you're all amazing and stay strong 🖤