Red; Blood and Love | Dazai X Reader

You're perfect

Welp, four chapters of fluff, here goes the first chapter. I have to place a warning on-

Possible trigger warning: Talk of abuse in a bit of depth near the end.

Sunlight dipped in through the newly replaced curtains, giving the darkened room some light. Dazai hadn't moved from bed yet, his eyes still shut, though he'd been awake for a while. His eyes refused to open, hung heavy with invisible weight. His limbs felt equivalent to lead, within his abdomen lay something similar to a rolling ball. His stomach twisted and turned, keeping him pinned onto the comfort of the bed. He knew he had to get up. If not for him for Y/n. He just had to give himself a few more moments. He'd let himself fall asleep without the aid of alcohol or other means the other night. It had been the first time since he was a child that he'd been able to simply fall asleep from real exhaustion. Taking care of a child was a lot to handle. Though he'd welcomed sleep, he forgot why he preferred the dreamless scape of darkness. Memories of the things he did all ended with that single instant he hated to recognize. That bloodstained tan coat within his hands as he desperately tried to remove the stains. His hands worked numbly, to the point he scrubbed his skin clean off. The empty realization he'd left somebody because somebody left him sitting in his chest.

Dazai cracked open his left eye when somebody tugged on his hands. "I'm hungry!" The child's voice whined, but it got Dazai to force his body to roll from bed. Pressing his hands to his eyes as he glanced down emptily at the small child. That twisting knot taking over his chest reminded him of everything he'd left behind. "Did you have a bad dream?" The innocent tone had stopped surprising him, he'd long since placed recognition with the simple fact, a child didn't understand the world's cruelty yet.

"Mmm, I'm simply a bit tired. Come on, let's get you ready to attend work with me." Dazai covered his face with his usual mask, standing up and dragging himself into the kitchen to prepare something simple that required no effort. Normally on these dates, he'd stay curled up, and his co-workers wouldn't bat an eye unless he stayed absent without any contact for longer than three days.

"Can we stay home today? You seem too tired to work!" Dazai debated it before nodding his head. He wouldn't mind sitting on the couch curled up in blankets while Y/n played or watched TV.

"Alright, we can stay home." The smile over their face lifted the weight clinging around his body enough for him to feel he could move around.

The day they spent together was rather relaxed. Until Y/n saw an ad for a fair. "What's this?"

"That's called a fair," Dazai hummed, flipping through TV channels while inside a cocoon of soft blankets.

"Can we go?" Once more, like they do each time they want something, they put on their puppy-dog expressions until Dazai dropped the blankets and sighed.

"Yeah, sure we can." Dazai couldn't help it. Even if his mind was weighing him down and he wanted to waste away, he just couldn't disappoint them. That smile worked like alcohol on him. Providing him relief even if it was only for a moment.

"Can we invite Atsushi-san and Ranpo-san oh, Kunikida-san and Yosano-san too!" Dazai nodded as he reached for his phone, unsurprised to see the load of messages and calls from his co-workers. Carefully going to the group chat, he asked everybody if they wanted to go to the fair. He made sure to state Y/n had wanted them to tag along.

When everybody replied with a yes, Dazai gave the expectant child a thumbs up. Luckily, they had a nap already, so if they ended up staying out late, it wouldn't be too hard on them. Dazai grabbed a bag and tossed in a few bottles of water and a few snacks on the healthier side of what they had in the cabinets. He took the child by the hand and led them out the door, down the elevator, and out into the setting sun. The reds and oranges dancing among the sky like small fires. Dazai looked up following the child's gaze with a soft expression over his face. He waited until they began to move to lead them to the fair. He followed directions on his phone, needing nothing but images to guide him. He knew this city like the back of his hand, of course, he didn't need real directions, merely relative placements. The child followed him, holding onto his hand close, not daring to wander too far from Dazai. Not that Dazai would let them get too far again.