Red; Blood and Love | Dazai X Reader

Heart-warming

The following morning Dazai woke up on the bed with a face hanging over him. Large glowing eyes staring down at him. "You seem different than usual? Something special happen while you were out drinking with your friend last night, Osamu? Do you want me to make you a snack or do you need stuff to help with a hangover?" Dazai froze, staring up at the figure that leaned over him. "Also, when did you crash in my bed? Weren't you the one to suggest we stay in separate rooms unless it was one of those nights?"

Dazai sat up in the bed unsure how he should react nor what version of Y/n he was dealing with. As he expected, he didn't have to speak. They had always known what he wanted, what mood he was in, how to make him feel a little better, or how to help him relieve stress and discomfort. Of course, they would mark the change in his persona. "You're not my Osamu..." They immediately backed up, glaring heavily at the person in front of them.

"Well yes, that's to be expected of somebody who's... from the future." Dazai smiled, awaiting the young mafia member's reaction.

They tilted their head looking around, "this is still my apartment though, given things are different, but it's still home." Dazai nodded before sighing as he moved from the bed.

"How old is the Dazai of your time?" Maybe they were still far enough back... but from their reaction and their way of speech that was unlikely.

"Huh? You're supposed to be 16?" Dazai's face fell gazing into their eyes and focusing. So they were at that point then...

"Ah, so you're that version of them... still smiling despite how miserable your eyes are. I always hated that fake smile, but I couldn't blame you when I had my own." Their faces fell with his words, eyes widening with a hitched breath, taking a step back.

"I- '' they began to speak, but Dazai shook his head, shoving his hands in his pockets as he continued striding on.

"No, I was cruel and heartless. That apology you continue to spout... stop it, alright? I've never liked it, the way when I knew I did something to upset you, how you bow your head and accept it as if I might really hurt you... I know why... I didn't then because you never talked about it, but I know now why you hated when I raised my voice, or when I stopped being gentle and soft. I know now why you would glare at me when I let loose on missions... I understand it now but the past can't be changed and I did what I did. So you don't have to keep apologizing when you've never done anything wrong in your life." he couldn't face them. Not when he knew he'd be faced with hollow, uncaring eyes. A tightly knit frown would be wound across their lips, the same expression they held when they steadied their mind to kill. Gone the fear of the child who'd shaken and cried out when they were hurt. Gone was the light of the child who'd smiled and chowed on candy. Gone is the child who clung to him and ran across the beach with him. Here stood the assassin, the light gone from their view.

As we grow, we only open our eyes to the evil that was always there taunting us.

"Let's head to work..." they shuffled after him, before encasing him in an embrace.

"How many years have passed to change you like this?"

"I'm twenty-two, so around 6 years have passed." Dazai didn't move their arms away. Welcoming the familiar embrace as they pushed their face into his back.

"Did you change your bandages today?"

"I'll do it tonight."

"The last time you showered?"

"Last night?"

"Did you eat dinner?"

"I did..."

"Then we can leave for work." This had been their old routine... before he'd sunk into being crueler. Three years into the mafia changed him. He was always dark, but his heart only grew blacker as he got further into the mafia. The more he climbed in the ranks, the faster he descended the pits of darkness.

Dazai began moving before the person behind him paused. "You noticed the coat right? You're smart, almost as intelligent as myself, so go on, make a guess."

He wasn't prepared for them to hold onto his arm with a bright smile. "You left! You truly left the Mafia?" Dazai nodded confused with how happy they were about this. "... but you're wearing Oda's coat... he's dead, isn't he? I'm sorry for your loss. I know he was important to you." Dazai nodded, his hand running through their hair, twirling it on his finger happily. "You took me with you right?" Dazai masked his expression. A little lie, to keep this moment joyful but sappy.

"Come on, to work, we go." Dazai smiled lightly as he pulled out his phone, shooting a text to the agency. They would act as if that's where they belonged.

He was going to enjoy them clinging to him for a bit. He'd enjoy making them a little content. All of his needs could be pushed aside for them.