Sunday Morning (A SIMON MARCOS FANFICTION)

TWELVE

AVERY

NERVOUS AS FUCK. That's what I am feeling right now. New year. We are in the Marcos family house which particularly means, I will be meeting the whole family which includes the former first lady, Imelda Marcos. I saw a glimpse of her a while ago but briefly. 

Simon and Sandro has already introduced Louise and I with their cousins. 

Ang sosyal nilang tignan. Ang sosyal nilang gumalaw at ngumiti. Louise is kinda used to it na because she has already met a few of them. Alam niyang makibagay sa kanila while I feel small in front of them. 

Most of them are at the peak of their career. Louise is making her way up by studying MBA and probably Law soon. Ako, walang tinapos na degree at hindi alam kung anong susunod na gagawin sa buhay. I feel really insecure right now. 

"Okay ka lang?" Tanong ni Louise sa tabi ko. Lahat kaming babae ay nasa isang room. Spencer is not around though. She and Vinny went home to her house. Ate Cara is here too with her kids. 

I shook my head. "No. Kinakabahan ako na nai-insecure sa inyo." I confessed.

Louise frowned and drank her wine. "Bakit ka naman mai-insecure sa amin? At sa akin ka pa talaga mai-insecure? Sure ka?" She scoffed a laugh.

I pressed my lips together. "You're Sandro's wife. You overcame whatever that has been holding you back before. You are spreading your wings. Nakapagtapos ka. You are getting your MBA degree. You have goals," I paused, looking at her. "Look at me. I did not finish anything or have any permanent job that I can be proud of."

Louise giggled. "Ganyan din ako noon," I looked at her. She was smiling, the kind of smile that is radiating with happiness.  "Well, sometimes until now I still feel insecure kasi nga, Marcos ang napangasawa ko. You know them," She said, rolling her eyes. "But then I realized, it will do me no good. Wala akong mapapala sa kakaramdam ng insecurity sa mga bagay. Sa ex or ex fling ni Sandro, na-insecure ako dati doon. Iyong inisip ko, ang ganda nila. Ang kinis. Ang perfect ng features. Pero at the end of the day, walang sense kasi ako naman ang inuuwian ni Sandro," She giggled na parang kinikilig. "Ako ang pinili. Ako ang nagustuhan. Ako ang pinapakilala sa family. Ako ang inaaraw-araw!" She laughed. 

I laughed. "Louise please."

She rolled her eyes. "I am proud kaya. Despite my bilbil and stretch marks, sabik pa rin siya sa akin. Hindi ba ganon si Simon sa iyo?" She asked, raising her brows. 

I looked away. "He's sweet."

"Sweet? Iyon lang?" She questioned.

"Ano yun? What's going on?" Ate Cara asked, joining us while holding her daughter in her arms. 

"Ate pagalitan mo nga iyan. Napaka-insecure." Louise told her. 

I widened my eyes at her. "Hey!"

Ate Cara laughed. "Well, I don't blame her. But hey, I am sure Simon accepts you for who you are."

"Insecure daw siya sa atin." Louise made sumbong again. I rolled my eyes on her. 

"Insecure ka sa amin?!" She exclaimed. "Please, AC, we're normal people. Naging sosyal lang dahil sa Marcos surname. But believe me, they are the most down to earth and generous people I ever met. 

Louise nodded. "Well raised nga daw sabi ni Spencer eh."

"Yeah. How is Spencer pala?" Ate asked. 

"Getting her shit together with Vinny." I only answered.

I went out. Doon sa malaking lawn nila na napapaligiran ng lights. I sat down on the small steps and sighed. 

"That's a long and heavy sigh."

I jerked. It was Mama Meldy. Simon was the one pushing her wheelchair. I stood up and fixed myself. 

"Hello po."

She only looked at me and then Simon. "Simon be a good man and play with your pamangkins." 

Simon couldn't object. He just gave me a faint smile and left. 

Napakamot ako ng ilong. I felt small. Ang sopistikada niyang tignan. She's wearing a red Filipiniana dress. 

"May gusto po kayong puntahan?" I ended up asking.

"No. I like the view here," She replied. "Can you help me? I want to sit down on the steps too."

"Sure po kayo?"

"Do I look like I am joking?"

Naumid dila ko at inalalayan siya na tumayo at maupo sa hagdan. Tumabi na rin ako sa kanya. 

"So, I heard my grandson proposed to you?"

"Uhm. Yes po."

"Why did you say yes?" She asked, looking at me.

I felt nervous but there's no turning back. I already said yes. Hindi ko babawiin iyon. I looked back at mama Meldy. 

"I love Simon po. Ever since Oxford, I have these feelings for him. Akala ko nga po admiration lang but it didn't stop there. So when I had the chance to be with him, I grabbed it. Ang saya sa pakiramdam.  But I had to leave because of my family. I couldn't go back to him kasi natakot po ako na baka wala akong babalikan. That the night we spent together was only a one time thing," I saw her widen her eyes. I just smiled. "Then we saw each other again. Grabe," I sighed. "I still harbor the same feelings for him kahit taon ang nakalipas."

Mama Meldy sighed. "I love that kid, Simon. He grew up so well. I thought he would end up competing with Sandro but he has clearly made a path for himself. So, Avery, please take care of Simon. And please don't feel insecure. I heard from Cara and Louise about your insecurity. Insecurity is not a good thing Avery. Simon chose you. I am sure he chose you because he is happy with you and that he loves you." 

It made me smile and miss my family. I gave her an embrace. She laughed and embraced me back. 

Louise, ate Cara and mama Meldy are right. Simon chose me. I do not need to be insecure especially that he doesn't make me feel insecure. It's all in my head. I am going to pursue growth  just like Louise. Be strong like Spencer. Calm like ate Cara. Be an inspiration like mama Meldy. Joyful like atty. Liza. And be my own person.

"Happy new year babe." Bati ni Simon sa akin. 

We stood up by the verandah, watching the fireworks. Mama Meldy started the celebration by blowing the torotot. I couldn't count how many times Louise jumped. Baka daw may pag-asa pa na tumangkad. I only rolled my eyes. 

"I love you Joseph Simon." I told him. I tiptoed to kiss him briefly on the lips.

"Are you ready to be Mrs. Marcos?" He asked.

I chuckled. "Excited much? I still have an operation remember?" 

We have already scheduled my operation with the doctor Simon found for me. We will head to Manila after new year  for my operation. After that, we'll stay in the studio apartment that Sandro owns while I take a rest from the operation. 

The wedding will be on June. Spencer offered to organize the whole event but Vinny did not agree. Louise wanted to but she is going to be busy with the new semester of her MBA studies, duties in BBM's headquarters and being Sandro's wife. Everyone is busy. 

Simon chuckled. "I can't wait to change your surname."

wavyu! :)