Vivid Dreams

let me out

Tyler

    I can't blame her for wanting to leave. The whole connected dreams thing is still weird and new. Hell it even scares me sometimes. I can't control my dreams. Lord knows what she could be seeing, I thought. But even with that, i can't help feeling like our dreams aren’t the only thing connected. As a way to distract myself, I call my ex girlfriend and long time best friend, Eleven or El for short. Stranger Things was our favorite show when we were together. We talked about how the move was, how we missed each other, and how it’s not the same being somewhere else.

    Monday when I got back to school, I tried to find Becka, but I had a certain feeling that she was avoiding me. That's fine she can find me whenever she wants. For now I'll just continue my day till she does. I continue like nothings going on. Then eventually the end of the day comes, and I still havent seen her. Maybe she stayed home today. I head home and decide to finish unpacking my room. As soon as my head hits the pillow, i pass out 

    I'm sitting in my old house in California back from when I was 10, my parents in the kitchen, arguing. “I'm not gonna keep moving around because of your job, Bruce. This isn't good for Tyler! It's not good for our relationship, when you're always at work and we never see you.” says my mother. I always hated this memory. I think as I see 10 year old me walk down the stairs. 

“Trish, the FBI is so close to breaking this case. After we do, we don't have to move anymore”.

“Until the next case comes along. Then what, Bruce? I'm not moving again”

“You won't have too. I'll make sure we stay where we are.”

    In all the arguing, my parents forgot that the stove was on. By now they had moved out to the living room, leaving it on. Within minutes the kitchen, dining room, office, and the living were on fire. My mother, being the brave woman she was, goes into try and fight the fire while my father grabs me off the stairs, rushes me outside, and puts me in the car. As He turns around to go get my mother, the house explodes. My father, shielding himself from the debris coming out from everywhere, lands on his knees, knowing as well as I did, that there was no way my mom couldn't have survived that. He put his face in his hand, starting to cry, I was doing the same. A few seconds later I tried to open the door to go comfort my dad but it was locked. I start screaming “LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT!” That's where the memory ends.

    I woke up with my dad standing in my doorway, looking very worried. I can feel my face is wet. I was crying. Shit. “dad. I- i had the dream again.” I know. I heard you screaming” he said as he came and sat next to me on my bed. I put my head on his shoulder and started to cry again. “ i miss her, dad.” I somehow manage to say through the tears. “ I know son. Me too” he says. We stayed like that until I stopped crying and fell asleep. He lays me down, I feel him linger, making sure that I'm ok. Things wont ever be the same. I miss you, mom. The rest of the night, i don't dream, i only pray that becca doesn't know what just happened.

    The next day, I got to school and Becka was waiting outside. Shit, I thought. She knows, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!  I was three steps away from her when Jay walked up to her and gave her a kiss. Well at least she wasn’t waiting for me. Lunch came around and I sat in the library, trying to get some more sleep. I hate nights like last night. I zoned out soon after I got there and didn't realize that Becka was standing in the doorway trying to get my attention. I focus on and ask “ what are you doing here?” she said “ one, i have study hall next period, and two, i saw you come in here.” 

“I gathered that, Becka, why did you follow me here?”

“I saw the dream you had last night. But it wasn't a dream, was it?”

Reluctantly I answered, “no it wasn't. Ever wonder why I never talk about my mom?”

“Not really.” she said “sorry to say i never really paid attention to mainly anything you say.”

“WOW, thanks Becka.” we laughed a little, before getting back to the topic at hand.

“I'm sorry she died like that, and that that happened. No kid should ever have to deal with something like that.” she said as she wiped tears from her eyes and placed her hand atop mine. I look at our hand sitting there and think, honestly, this is nice. The bell rings, indicating for me to leave and head to class. I get up, keeping her hand in mine. She stopped me and hugged me then asked me to let her hand go. I do so, unwillingly. 

    The rest of the day was a blur. When i got home, my dad was gone, so i went and got some chinese food. I ordered food for dad too, i know he’ll be hungry when he gets home. I didn't feel like doing much of my homework after I ate. I just couldn't stop thinking about the way it felt to touch Becka's hand. I've touched it before, i know, but it felt different this time. I can't explain it. Damn brain why must you complicate my thoughts. All thoughts aside, I do some more research on Becka. I found out that she moved here from Salt Lake City, Utah when she was in 3rd grade. I was just a town away. Fuck! I was so close to her. “I wish i had known you then.'' I said. “Who you talking about, kid?'' I jump as I hear my fathers voice in the doorway of my room. “No one dad. Just doing some research.'' I try to close my laptop, but he caughts it before I do. “Becka Evans? Son, what are you up too?” “nothing dad. Shes a friend, i just wanna know more about her.” “whatever you say kid.” he says as he heads back to the living room. That was close.