New Life

Chapter 26- Back To School

I finally got to school. I declined Sam’s offer for a ride, I wanted to take my time to think things over and get my head straight before I meet Ian.. what was I even going to say to him?

I was a few minutes late because I kept stopping a few times and considered turning back, but I couldn’t run away! Ian needed an explanation, even if it was going to be a lie he needed to move on…

The school halls were dead as the lessons were already in session, great.. now I’m going to have to walk in and all eyes will be on me- Ian’s eyes! It scared me to think what mood he’ll be in. If he would make a scene in front of everyone, if he would just walk out, or if he won’t let me walk out! If we are alone, by tonight he would have convinced me to get back with him and my mother will pay the price… I shut my eyes momentarily to fight the tears, ‘stay strong for mum!’ my subconscious said, giving me the strength to carry on.

I reached for the handle to maths. My hands were beginning to sweat, my mouth dry and butterflies in my stomach… I don’t want to this!! ‘do it, do it, DO IT!!’ my mind told me over and over again for encouragement.  And I used all my little strength left to turn the handle and slowly open the door to reveal the classroom.

Just like I though, all eyes were glued to me, following my every move.. its no surprise that our break up would be the talk of school, seeing as all of the school witnessed it! I lifted my head and slowly the classroom filled my sight, every gaze meeting mine- except one.. Ian wasn’t here!

I exhaled the air I unconsciously held and relaxed… at least I wouldn’t have to sit next to him uncomfortably for an hour! But where is he?

***

Today was very strange, I went through college and it was as if nothing had happened! Other than all the staring, roomers and gossiping it was like any other day.

It was Tuesday so I had football practice, finally I can use this to let out all the anger and frustration I had been feeling the past week after thinking about Richard! Oh how I would love to punch him so hard in the face!! ‘calm Mia… we’ll have our payback, some day!’

“SAM!” I shouted and waved as I ran over to Sam sitting in on the bench at the side of the boys football practice, with Aaron.. I guess things between those two are getting serious! They are perfect for each other, the way he holds her close in his arms- protecting her.. how I miss and envy that! A sharp pain shot through my chest and tears stung my eyes, threatening to fall. ‘pull it together Mia!’

Sam noticed me and pulled away a little from Aaron, “MIA!!” she screamed back before running and jumping into my arms.

“Hi Aaron…” things felt strange between me and Aaron, but I understood- I broke his best friend’s heart and embarrassed him in front of everyone!

“Hi… erm… I’ve got to get back to practice, bye babe” He quickly kissed Sam before returning to practice. As soon as we were alone Sam hit me hard on the arm!

“OWW! What?”

“Ian missed school because he’s been out looking for you!!” What! No! well that explains why I have luckily not spent an awkward moment with him yet… I didn’t think he would go that far to search for me!

“I didn’t ask him to…” I whispered, not meaning the words that came out. I swung my head down and looked at my feet.

Sam picked up on my depression, she understood that I had no choice.. “I’m sorry Mia… its just, I see how happy you are with Ian an how happy Ian is when you’re around, and I want you to be together…”

I didn’t reply.. I didn’t know what to say, instead I just walked off to practice and try and get my mind off things- that’s going to be hard!

***

It was late and dark by the time I got outside. I was the last to leave, there was no one waiting for me at home so I offered to clean up. I locked the sports hall like I was instructed and made my way out and over the grass to the deserted car park, well empty except for one… the sports car of my dreams with the man of my dreams leaning against the door.

“mia…”

Shocked, I froze! Ian's dark form walked into one of the street lights, highlighting his pale, ill, unshaven face…

“Oh Ian you look like hell…”

“I’ve been dragged through hell over the past few days.. we need to talk!”

“I’m just on my way home, I’ll call you tomorrow…”

“No you won’t, I want to talk now!”

“Ian….”

“I’ll give up my job, my inheritance! I won’t work for my father, I’ll donate all my money to a charity of you choosing I'll give everything up, so please... please Mia...I need you!!” hope shined in his eyes.. he thinks we’ve broken up because he loves his money more than me… its better than knowing the truth! When I didn’t respond his hope disappeared..

“I don’t know what you want me to say Ian!”

“Say you love me, say you’ll take me back…”

My jaw locked and i shut my eyes trying to contain the tears “I don’t love you Ian..”

Ian stumbled back and his eyes glazed over in tears, “We both know that’s not true, I love you Mia more than my own life!! I haven’t been able to sleep, eat even think straight without you!!!”

“Ian…stop…” I’m almost at breaking point… please stop Ian!

“no! its killing me Mia! Please… I know I’ve done wrong, I just want to look after you, to care for you and money’s the only way I know how!!” He was begging, his voice breaking as tears began to fall from Ian’s beautiful hazel eyes and down his sculptured cheek bones… I can’t look at him, or I would break down to! I took that chance to run past him and try to escape.

Ian quickly grabbed my wrist, spinning me around and then I was in his arms, his lips pressed on mine!

I didn’t move my mouth, I kept it shut.. it took all my strength to resist him, to resist relaxing in his muscular embrace and kiss him back. “Please..kiss me!” His hold got tighter, pulling my body so close to his that there was no space left, his lips went rougher on mine but still I staid still. From my lack of a reaction, I felt the wetness of his tears on my cheek before he pulled away..

“Leave me alone… Ian… we’re over”

His eyebrows pushed closer together as he winced.. “Don’t say that…” all the strength in his body escaped and Ian collapsed to the floor and onto his knees. I could look anymore, I had destroyed the once strong and powerful Ian Marsh… I’m sorry!

I turned and ran out of the school and down the long road to my house. Tears uncontrollably streamed down my cold face as the wind hit my face.

I didn’t realise that I had ran to Joe’s before I was in his warm arms. He brushed his hands through my hair, comforting me but I didn’t want to be in his arms… I wanted Ian, I needed him! only he could make this better… only Ian!

"Shhhh, what's wrong?"

"Ia...Ian..." Was all i could say between my hysterical crying.

"I'ts ok baby girl... everythings going to be alright!"

-Ian’s P.O.V-

“Leave me alone…. Ian… we’re over” The words stuttered out her mouth, words I thought I would never hear. They were like a punch to the gut, sucking all the air out of my body till I couldn’t breathe!

“Don’t say that…” It was all I was capable of saying. I know she doesn’t really want to… I can see its killing her just as much as it Is me… but then why is she doing this? I couldn’t think straight… I had no strength left and collapsed onto the floor. Hot tears stinging as they fell, The love of my life is leaving me and there’s nothing I can do… Mia, I need you, I love you!!