Espresseleine oneshots 🍂

Perfectly Imperfect 🍂

Type: angst, hurt/comfort

Warnings: none

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Espresso laid his head on his desk, tissues thrown askew all across the floor, sniffling quietly overtop crumpled papers.

With harshly gripped fistfuls of his hair, he told himself he was worthless, lazy, imperfect.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

He's dealt with a lot of mistakes during his magic career, and that was okay. What wasn't okay was the way he'd attempted this spell hundreds of times already. Hundreds of times within the past hours, over and over again, with no glimpse of success.

He didn't want to take a break. He didn't want to do anything at all until he perfected this. He had to perfect it. He had to be perfect.

After slamming his head against the desk hard enough to bruise, Espresso pushed himself up to try again. But as he did so, he heard the faintest 'click' of the door unlatching.

Espresso froze with his hand halfway in the air and his mouth agape.

" 'Spresso...?" a kind voice spoke from behind the cracked door. Though Espresso couldn't see the cookie, the only logical conclusion was that it was his boyfriend and housemate, Madeleine.

Espresso didn't utter a word. He slowly dropped his hand and closed his mouth.

"Espresso... may I enter? I thought I heard you crying and heard a loud bang, and just wanted to check on you-"

"...I suppose."

Madeleine walked in, shutting the door behind himself. When he saw Espresso's tear-stained face, he frowned. " 'Spresso... what's the matter?"

"What ever do you mean? Everything is under perfect control," said the sleep-deprived cookie, obviously unaware of his own physical state.

"Espresso, your face says it all."

Espresso's expression dropped to one of absolute horror.

"Oh nono, not that you look bad or anything! You're always quite handsome!" Madeleine gave a light-hearted laugh before approaching his boyfriend. "Seriously though, what's up?"

"Nothing much. Simply trying out a new spell."

"...Wasn't that what you were doing four hours ago?"

"Yes indeed I know." Espresso looked down.

"You stressin' about it?"

Espresso didn't want to admit it. To admit he was struggling, that he was a failure. He didn't want to admit that sometimes he was a little bit slow in understanding new concepts. "I'll try to finish it up quickly." He hated seeming weak, especially in front of Madeleine.

"Oh, nono." Madeleine wagged his finger as though he was scolding a child. "You're taking a rest. You're obviously over-exerting yourself and won't admit it."

Rest? How ever could he rest knowing he's yet to perfect the spell? He must keep going. He must. "But-" before Espresso could continue his sentence, however, he found himself pinned down to the bed by his wrists. "Please let me go."

"No, Espresso. You're going to lay down." Madeleine sighed. "I worry about you."

Espresso squirmed uncomfortably under Madeleine's grasp. "Let go... I'm not done yet."

"Espresso, relax."

"I can't! Let me go, you moron!" Espresso spat, tears pricking the corners of his eyes. "I- I haven't per- perfected the spell yet... I need to... Madeleine... Please..."

Madeleine showed a pained expression at the cookie's struggling. He let go of his wrists and rather pulled him into a light hug instead. "Sorry, 'Spresso. I'm keeping you here. You don't need to worry about that silly spell right now."

"I-it's not silly-" Espresso had begun to sob. "I'm a failure, Madeleine-"

"Don't say that! You're divine in so many ways! Just because you can't solve one spell doesn't mean you're any sort of failure at all." Madeleine laid down, pulling Espresso with him. "Just lay here with me for a bit and relax. It's okay, Espresso. You don't need to perfect it. It's okay. You're okay," Madeleine hummed, tugging a soft gray blanket over both of their bodies. "You're not a failure, you're okay, you're fine. I love you."

Espresso sniffled, wrapping his arms around Madeleine and nuzzling his face into his chest.

"In fact, you're the most handsome, smartest, perfect man I know. That's why someone as great as me loves you so, 'cause you're so amazing," Madeleine cooed, pressing a kiss to his boyfriend's forehead. "It may seem silly to someone as intelligent as you, but, in my eyes, perfection comes with its imperfections."

Espresso raised his head and widened his eyes. "What- what ever do you mean?" His glasses, fogged up from the tears, were pressed uncomfortably against his face from being previously squished in Madeleine's chest.

Madeleine reached down and removed those glasses, setting them on the nightstand. "What I'm saying is, to be perfect, you have to be imperfect, 'Spresso. Somebody with no flaws is just boring and overpowered." He began to rub soothing circles on Espresso's back. "Even somebody as superb as me has their flaws!"

"...Yeah, like being an annoying moron." Espresso snorted, giving a small laugh through the tears.

"Yeah, eheh. Just like that." Madeleine pressed his forehead against Espresso's. "You're perfect to me, is what my point is. So very perfect. You're beautiful, even."

Espresso began to blush. "Oh, quit it."

"But it's true! You're absolutely adorable." Madeleine pinched Espresso's cheek. "And an adorable cookie such as you should relax. Really, Espresso. When's the last time you slept?"

Espresso stared for a moment as though he were internally counting on his fingers. "Saturday..."

"And what day is it today?" asked Madeleine, not having high hopes.

Espresso paused again. "Wednesday."

" 'Spresso!" Madeleine pouted.

"What?"

"That's BAD!"

"Is it now?"

Madeleine screamed into his pillow.

"I see." Espresso hummed.

"Espresso, I think if you slept, this spell would be significantly be less stressful for you."

"Would it, now?"

"YES! You're sleep-deprived!"

"Nonsense. I have coffee."

Madeleine stared at Espresso for a moment with a disappointed glare, somehow silently managing to ask, 'really?'

"...Though I suppose if I am by your side, I will rest for a little while."

Madeleine smiled. "Good, good."  He then got up for a moment, shutting all the lights off before climbing back into the bed with Espresso.

Espresso latched onto Madeleine as soon as he felt the man's weight by his side. With his face pressed against his boyfriend's chest, he purred. "I actually quite enjoy this..."  he mumbled as Madeleine pulled him closer.

"Yes, now hush, it's bedtime for you, pretty boy."

"I suppose it is."

Then there was silence. For a long while, nothing but faint breaths went communicated in the dark. All until Madeleine mumbled a soft: "Night, 'Spresso,"  against his lover's ear