Eva

Chapter 24

I focus on Alex's adam apple bob up and down when he gulps. I guess I want to focus on anything that isn't about me.

It's ironic because I shared more about me to him than anyone I met in this city. I hope he won't use this against me.

But I know people and people tend to do that. Then I'll really look even more pathetic.

I don't know what I was expecting from someone who hasn't had to worry about a day in his life. Frankly, I take his silence as offensive. But what do you say to someone who pours out about their fucked up childhood?

Yeah, I would stay quiet too.

I see he doesn't budge or move. His eyes keep burning into me as if he's studying me and I refuse to indulge in this anymore. I make an impulsive decision to get out of here.

"I should leave," I move past him to grab my bag and pull out a sweater.

"What?" he sounds confused. "Why?"

Because I'm broken and there's nothing you can do to help me.

I don't answer him.

He shakes his head as if I'm insane and made some madness up. "Where are you going to go?" he comes closer to me and I look up from my bag.

His eyes are saying something but he doesn't voice anything.

I'm scared to let him in, I feel as if I made a mistake in letting him see a part of me. I don't mean to but I can't help the way my voice snaps at him. "You don't even know me and honestly you didn't even like me. Are you saying you like me now?"

He flinches, "Eva it's the middle of the night, just stay until the morning."

I look at his clock on the drawer, "your clock says its 4am- it's morning. I'm leaving."

"Eva, where is this-"

I cut him off, " I appreciate you letting me stay for a night but we..." I distant off. I know what I'm trying to say but he won't and I can't burden him with something he has no part in.

"We what?" He emphasizes on the what.

"We're not friends," I shrug my shoulders. "You literally have a movie theater in your house and your room could be spilt into three separate bedrooms. We come from different wor-"

"So my dad's money is the problem?" He sounds confused with a hint of annoyance.

I'd admit I sound dumb and unsure right now but I refuse to do this to Alex. Just another person getting into my unsolvable problems.

I'm a nobody with no money, no family, and no future with him.

The hell I endured as a child is not something someone else deserves to be burden with.

It's my burden, my hell, my agony. I don't need him to understand or protect me. I need him to stay away from me.

I'm just a broken girl and no one wants a damaged thing.

"Eva," he says softly.

I don't even know if he enjoys my company or pities me instead. I say the only thing I know that will hurt his ego.

"You. You're the problem."

I have no idea what came out of mouth and I don't know what I'm doing. I have no where to go, no one to turn to but he does not need to get dragged down with me. The bile in my throat rises and I want to puke. I turn away from him before he says anything else and I run down the stairs to get out of here.

When I open the door, the cool misty air hits my face and I take it in. I sprint towards the gate of his house and when I make it to the end, I turn to look at my last safe haven.

No one has to understand what I did, I do though.

I know everything revealed tonight was all too much for him and I'm vowing to myself now that I have to stay away.

I crave for a home filled with comfort, safety, and love. But I know the cycle that is destined by the people who birthed me is inevitable and I'll be running forever.

Everyone deserves a safe haven.

He deserves one.

He deserves a home.

A home filled with warmth, gentleness, and affection.

Something that I can never give him.

.

.

.

A little shorter. Sorry for inconsistency of chapters :( It felt like a good place to stop though. What did you think about this chapter?

Do you agreed with Eva? Why or why not?

Comment your thoughts! Don't forget to vote also:)

Thank you so much for the endless support. I love yall! <3 xoxo.

-A