SPAM.

87

You: should've just
called the cops

You: but then they'd have
been like "wtf is this conversation"

You: no wait they'd understand
if I said I was pretending to be
chill so I can catch u

You: but then they'd be like "why
u trynna catch him, I thought
we were the cops"

You: then I'd be like "I'm not sure
if this person's a criminal"

You: but now
read

Justin Seagull: what

You: now that I know u
are Justin seagull

You: I diagnose u
with criminalitis

Justin Seagull: ...

Justin Seagull:
It can't be! No way! Why Doctor Why?!!

You: u have all the
symptoms of criminalitis

Justin Seagull: 😭😭😭

Justin Seagull: but on a serious note

Justin Seagull:
even though I did not intend any
harm ever and don't mean to do
anything bad with anyone

Justin Seagull:
don't hesitate in matters like this

Justin Seagull:
If u feel unsafe or uneasy and some
dumbfuck like me texts u, just report
everything to police

You: aight brb
gotta call someone

Justin Seagull: T-T

You: what if u are a criminal
and u r saying all this to get on
the good side and portray yourself
as a kind empathetic person

Justin Seagull: T-T

You: what the fuck is Jin
doing in there?

Justin Seagull: I just texted him

Justin Seagull:
he said he'll be back after
finishing this one order

You: I forgot I can just
walk out of this place and
never comeback

You: then move out of this city

You: change my name

Justin Seagull:
I will explain everything for sure
I understand your safety concerns
It's the era of internet and data
mining is a serious issue

Justin Seagull:
I just want you to know I am not
involved in anything like that

You: that's the problem you know