The Evil That Men Do | $UICIDEBOY$ | $CRIM

4: Vices

(this song and Mount Sinai are my faves of all time <3)

Scott's POV

Since I didn't feel comfortable with myself alone at my own house, Aristos allowed me to stay in his guest bedroom at his house. I felt safer and happier to be with someone else instead of my thoughts. It also allowed me to fix the bond Aristos and I currently have, and to make it stronger for our gang's sake, and for us.

It reminded me of how Winnie and her brother live together and work that way. I hoped, and felt a little excited, that this would work for us. I believed it would to a certain degree, at least.

It reminded me of this one guy I had met before—granted I did beat the shit out of him and stabbed him... If I wasn't fucked up at the time, I probably wouldn't have cared, and just asked for a better reschedule time or just flat bailed from him. But no, I went out and beat his ass because he had to bail on a deal.

He mentioned something before I kicked his ass about his father being his boss. He said he didn't want to fuck with their trust by selling their supply to us. It was a long time ago, and I don't remember much after the adrenaline kicked in.

"Hey man, I'm about to grab some jambalaya, you want any?" Aristos pulled me out of my memories.

I nodded. "Yeah. Fuck yeah. Can I get a coke, too?"

He nodded before leaving the room, closing the door lightly as he did. I began to wonder if maybe I should spend some quality time with my family?

I went and opened the door and saw his figure at the end of the hallway in the kitchen. I hollered, "You mind if I come with?"

A smile quickly etched into his face. "Why you askin'? Let's get it." It made me genuinely happy for the first time in a long time.

-

Later that evening, after Aristos and I chowed down heavy, I found myself sitting in my room, the guest room—whatever—setting up my laptop and launch pad and small keyboard. It was my basic set up away from my main studio at my house. It was trashed though, unfortunately. I had a fit of rage off the pills and H, and haven't had the heart to clean it up yet. It was a depressing chore that awaited me. I would rather face it with a clear head than my current state.

I found myself wondering about Winnie again... I wasn't expecting any of that. I figured she'd hate me for what I did, even though it wasn't really in my control. I was literally days sober off H and pills, being addicted for years. It fucked with my head so much, it was beyond my control at that point. All I could do was drive normally and it calmed me down. That's all I could do at the time that didn't give me the option to bitch about anything or try to start shit with anyone. But...

Maybe it was my attachment issues, I don't know, but she kept me thinking. And then I found myself pulling up her number and the keyboard sitting in front of my thumbs.

Well, here goes nothing.

'hey, winnie, it's scott. just
wanted to shoot you a text
so you can save my number
to your phone ☺️'

I sat there and stared at the text. I feel like the emoji is the only thing holding the mood of this message, if I took it off it'd be too nonchalant... an exclamation point at the end is too... excited.

God, why should I fucking care?

My heart rate shot through the roof when my thumb pressed send. I watched the message deliver and I sat there staring at the single text. I'll look like a fucking idiot if she doesn't text back. I know she's very busy with everything, but at least a confirmation text.