The Life We Left Behind

Happier together

„Oh, wow! It's you!", Henry said startled as the platinum blonde woman behind the bar turned around.

„Why sure, who else?"

„What's with the blonde wig?"

„It's Halloween!", Roni replied with a beaming smile as if that was the most obvious thing in the world.

„And who are you supposed to be? Marilyn Monroe?"

She sighed and threw up her hands. „Why does everyone think that? It's Sandy, from ‚Grease'!"

„Oh... I see. But then you need the, the... this tight black suit with, you know, the...", he was gesturing around his chest area and had obvious trouble saying the word ‚breasts' or ‚boobs' or even ‚cleavage' out loud to her.

She raised an eyebrow. „In your dreams! Plus, it's still early. You don't know what I got in store for later tonight. By the way..." She put a glass containing a fuming red liquid down in front of him. „This is my special cocktail creation for tonight, I call it the ‚Poisoned Apple'. Try it and tell me if you like it, I'm still experimenting."

He took a sip and said: „It could use a dash of cinnamon."

„Cinnamon? Huh... I never thought of that." She went back to mixing her potions behind the bar. 

„And how about you? Which costume you're rocking today, gloomy writer who's unhappily in love?"

She instantly could have kicked herself for that insensitive comment after Henry told her about visiting his wife and daughter's graves yesterday. She walked around the counter to sit down on the bar stool next to him and tried to comfort him as best she knew how. After all, we all have to let go of our ghosts eventually. And moving forward doesn't mean we forget the dead.

He took another sip of her fuming concoction, then a deep breath and tried to put on a smile before changing the topic to her.

„And how about you?", he nodded towards the bouquet of fresh flowers standing on the counter looking somewhat out of place in a bar like hers, „You and Rogers, huh? He seems to be courting you just right."

Roni blushed and lowered her gaze for a second, smiling almost dreamily. Then she shrugged. „Yeah, he really does. I don't know, I mean, we're still trying to figure things out. But it does feel like it could really turn into something serious. Even though that thought scares the hell out of me. I really, really like him. I like being with him. And I think he likes me too."

Henry nodded. „Trust me, he does! But why does it scare you?"

„Oh well, for obvious reasons, we just talked about it. In a way, love is weakness, you know? Love makes you strong, but it also makes you vulnerable. You can lose the one you love, or you can get hurt by them. And... I've had my share of that just like you. I pushed it away so far that I don't even quite remember what happened, but I know that there still is a gaping hole in my heart that no one has yet managed to fill. And by putting my hopes on Rogers, I also open myself up to the potential disappointment of finding out that I was wrong. Also, I just don't want to lose him as a friend, you know? I don't want to ruin our relationship as it is by trying to force it into something that it is not."

Henry had nodded knowingly while she was trying to explain her thoughts and worries to him, then he asked: „You two have history together?"

„Oh yes. Rogers and I have known each other for as long as I can remember. And for just as long, we... well, let's just say, we've become accustomed to enjoying each other's company after dark, if you get what I mean."

He pulled a face and he wasn't even quite sure why. „I... I do! And... I don't need to know the details, please, it's alright."

She was relieved because for some reason it felt odd for her too, discussing her sex life with him, even though usually she wasn't shy about those things at all.