The Life We Left Behind

Welcome back, Regina!

„Roni?", he said now for the second time before it finally startled her and he found her brown eyes blinking at him in confusion. „Could you pass the salt, please?"
He could see that she had been somewhere else in her thoughts completely since they had sat down for lunch.
„Oh... oh, of course, sorry!", she passed the salt.
„Are you sure you're okay, love?"
„Yeah... no", she added, mumbling while crossing her arms in front of her chest like a stubborn toddler, „Stupid Victoria Belfrey..."
„She really did a number on you with that picture, aye?"
„I mean, can you blame me? How would you feel if someone was playing with you in that way, trying to trick you into believing that you have a kid you forgot all about somehow, and also, you're actually supposed to be a completely different person from a completely different place, some fancy-shmancy lawyer or something in a silly pantsuit, or even some sort of fairytale character? I mean, come on! It's so stupid, it's extra annoying."
„I get what you mean. And we're gonna get her for it, don't worry. I'm close, I can feel it. It's only a matter of time."
„Worst thing is, she's really getting to me, you know? I'm actually wondering... is or was there a Regina Mills who adopted a little boy in Maine? And, and I cannot believe I'm saying this, but, could it have been me?"

He shook his head. „No, love, look at me!", he took her hand and focused his eyes on hers, „Don't let her play you! Don't fall victim to her games, she's just messing with your mind. Just ignore it."
„How can I? I mean, if there is a chance I really have a child..."
„No, Roni. I'm sorry, I know this is a sensitive topic. But, you don't. How could this be something you just forget about like that? Magic?" He scoffed.
She took a deep breath, then managed a smile. „Maybe you're right, Detective."
„If it makes you feel better, I can run a search through the adoption files in Maine for a Regina Mills."
„No need... You're right. I'm better off trying not to think about it anymore."

The truth was that she had already asked Weaver for that favor. She didn't want Rogers to get into trouble because of her. She could barely bear the suspense waiting for the results of his search, even though her boyfriend was probably right: it was nothing. This whole thing was nothing but a ridiculous farce, and she had to make it stop, if only for that little girl Lucy's sake.

***

Her head was still spinning painfully when Drizella had left her alone in that bar... her bar. She had the feeling that she needed to hold on for dear life, as if the whole world was spinning around her, or else she would fall. Not just down to the floor, but deep into oblivion.

This was a disaster! No way out, Drizella had said. But there must be... there was always a way out, wasn't there? And if there was, then she would find it. Who else but her, Queen and Mayor Regina Mills. The one who started it all. Geez, had she only worked on her anger management issues a little earlier...
Finally, she let herself sink to the floor, pulling her shaking knees towards her chest. Her cheeks were wet, she was still crying, violent sobs shaking her whole body every now and then. Still, the memories were coming back to her, one more physically painful than the next, it still wasn't over. Just slower now, like a faucet that went from gushing water to merely dripping, shortly before drying out.

Henry... he really was her son, her sweet little boy! Lucy, her granddaughter. Her father. Her mother. Her sister, Kelly... no... Zelena! This was all too much for her to grasp. Robin. Daniel. The Enchanted Forest, the curse, Storybrooke, Rumple, Snow & Charming, Emma, Hook... Hook. Her... no... no, it couldn't be. Did they... oh no!

She heard the door open and jerked around, ready for a fight. Rogers, no... Hook raised his hands, his real and his fake one, to calm her down, then he turned pale as he saw how upset and wrecked she looked. „Wow, easy there... Oh my God!! What happened?"
He took a few decisive strides towards his girlfriend, obviously intending to hug and comfort her, but she instinctively pulled back. „No! Please... I'm alright, just... don't touch me."