The Promise

No Guarantee

When we arrive at my house, I head upstairs to change. I throw on some silk pajama bottoms and a white t-shirt. I pull my curled hair up off my neck and leave my makeup on. Steve and Bucky also change. They always keep clothes here because they practically live here. It's nice having other people in the house. Since my parents died, it gets so quiet. I guess it's gonna be like that again tomorrow.

I go downstairs and Bucky is sitting on the couch and Steve is still upstairs. I go to your counter and pour myself a drink. Tomorrow. One day until my very best friends in the world are shipped out of my life. The only people I have left, except maybe Howard. I stand there gazing at a picture of my family, thinking long and hard. The tears begin to flood my eyes. I try to blink them away, but they keep coming.

"You alright?" Bucky chimes in, breaking my daze.

"Yeah of course. Why wouldn't I be?"

"I heard you... um..crying." His face looks serious.

"I'm fine, Barnes. I'm just gonna be lonely. That's all."

"Why don't you join too. You can be a nurse like your mom. Or go work with Howard. You're smarter than he is. That way you can meet other people, instead of staying in this house like you do all the time. I practically had to drag you out tonight." He says with a hollow chuckle.

"I can't do that. I already asked Howard." I lie.

"Come on Y/N. There's gotta be some other job."

"Just leave it. It is what it is."

"Y/N.."

"James, leave it." I say sternly, turning away from him. I take a sip of my drink. I hear Steve coming down stairs from changing.

"Somebody turn on some music. We need to enjoy tonight." Steve says. Bucky looks at me a little longer before going to the stereo. He plays my favorite song. I smile at him warmly.

Later, Steve fell asleep in my guest room. He's so excited. I don't mean to make him sound like a little kid, but joining the army was something he dreamed of since the war began, especially since his parents died. Bucky and I continued sitting downstairs. There isn't much left to do.

"It's getting late and we should probably go to bed. You have a big day tomorrow, Barnes." I say gruffly.

"Y/N. Can you stop pretending like you're fine. It's me. You can tell me everything." I start to walk away from him to avoid the conversation. I'm only a little drunk, but I don't want to say anything I shouldn't. "Y/N!" He grabs my hand and pulls me back down to the couch, raising his voice only slightly. "What's wrong?"

"You're leaving. and Steve's leaving. And my parent's left. And Stark's never home. I'm gonna be alone. and not just for the duration of the war, but...." My voice trails off.

"There's no guarantee any of us will come back." Bucky finishes my sentence. He really does get me.

"Yeah. What happens if none of you come back? I have to bury you guys by myself?" I start to choke up. A single tear streams down my face. Bucky wipes it away. I hate when I cry. I find it so embarrassing.

"I promise you. One of us will come back. I'll come back. I promise."

"Buck, you can't promise me that. You don't know what's gonna happen. Don't promise me that unless you're sure."

"Y/N. I promise you." He says to me seriously.

"Ok." I look at him. He pulls me next to him on the couch. He puts his arm around me and I lay slightly on his chest. He puts his head on top of mine.

"We're gonna be fine." He says, affirmingly.

"Ok." I pause. "But if you're lying to me, I'm kicking your ass. Dead or not."

"Always gotta ruin the moment, Y/N." He says through a smile.