Bond Made in Hell || A TAEJIN STORY || Arranged Marriage

32

This book was badly in need of a chapter where Jin sorts out his emotions. I was hoping to have it come a bit later but I'm pretty sure both you and I will go mad by then.😤 So here it is.

⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING

Jin

All I can hear is the wind whistling past my ears as I stumble blindly out of the room. All I can think is get, get, get away from there. Get away from Jungkook. And everybody else.

As I rush down the hallway with no sense of speed or direction I bump into someone coming from the opposite direction. He groans in pain and drops the files he was holding, clutching his head.

'Wha- Mr Kim!'

'Namjoon?' I look at him blankly, my mind still too messed up to even fake concern. 'I'm sorry.'

'It's okay,' he says, bending down to pick up the files and wincing slightly. He stares at me for a moment as he straightens up. 'Mr Kim, is everything okay? You look....a little out-of-sorts.'

'I'm fine.' I force a smile. 'Just need a breath of air, that's all.'

'You sure?' He narrows his eyes at me. 'You know you can always talk to me if you need to, Mr Kim.'

How can I fucking talk to you about something like this? I want to scream at him. How can I fucking talk to anybody about this?

But I only nod my head, trying my best to be polite despite the circumstances. 'I know. I'll be out for just a minute.'

'Sure,' Namjoon watches me go, and I can hear him shaking his head and sighing as he resumes walking down the hallway.

I resume running down the corridor, dashing into the elevator just as it's about to close and pushing the button for the ground floor. As there's a jolt and the elevator begins moving smoothly downwards I sink down on the polished floor, leaning my head against the cold wall. I am still struggling to process what just happened.

Jeon Jungkook just kissed me.

He actually fucking kissed me.

And I didn't feel a thing.

I didn't feel a thing.

I didn't feel the spark the way I had with Taehyung.

I didn't feel the butterflies erupt and flutter wildly in the middle of my chest.

I didn't feel the waves and waves of overwhelming and addicting pleasure.

No, all I could think of while he kissed me was......Taehyung.

And for a few seconds, I imagined the lips to be.....his own.

I didn't feel the desire, the strong, suffocating desire to be one, the way I had done when Taehyung kissed me that night. No, all I felt was worry. And confusion. And fear. That was the reason my heartbeat had picked up. My pulse had quickened, and so had my breathing.

It was not the fear of Jungkook kissing me without my will.

It was not the fear of being estranged for him for maybe the rest of forever.

It was not even the somewhat rational fear of being caught, being seen.

It was the fear of realization. The worst fear of all, one I had been facing since years and that had never quite left me.

It was the fear of having fallen in love.

But not with him.

Not with Jungkook.