James Hobbs' School for Troubled Boys (Old Version)

JHS4TB: Chapter Five

JHS4TB: Chapter Five

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Josh’s P.O.V

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            We were all sitting in a circle on the floor of the living room, it had been a week since we went to Lucian’s aunt’s house for dinner, now it was official get to know the freshman. All around this school, every dorm was suppose to be doing this, you had to tell everyone why you were sent to this school. We had to be each other’s comfort and we could not do that without knowing everything, Louis got to start this year. “I am Louis Tomlinson and I am gay, super gay and that is why I am here. My stepfather walked in on me having sex with fuck-buddy/best friend, Stan, in our shed. Mark is a homophobe, convinced my mum that I was disgusting and needed to be sent to a place like this, a place where I would never need to go home again. I am a senior and I applied for college in the town over, I also set in to work here next year, along with Zayn.” Louis was sitting next to Zayn, who smirked at Lucian, the boy in question was squealing all over the place.

            “I am Zayn Malik, my parents are filthy rich and found out I liked weed, so here I am.”

            “Yo hoes, my name is Ed and I am here because I am a sex addict…Naw, I lie, I am here because my parents didn’t like the fact I smoked marijuana.”

            “Hello, I am Josh. I am here because my father killed himself and my mum couldn’t stand to look at me anymore.”

            “I am Liam Payne and I was forced here by a judge, I’m a pyro-manic and I accidently set a house on fire.”

            “Lucy here and I am at JHS because I told my parents I didn’t believe in a God that wasn’t okay with gays, so yeah.”

            “Me name is Niall and I am here because I got kicked out of too many schools for fighting.”

            “M’ Harry. I tried to kill myself and my parents found out I had been cutting for a while.” As soon as Harry was done talking, my hands were shaking and I was seeing red, my wallet weighing heavy in my pocket. I let out a growl and everyone turned to look at me, noticing my glare at Harry and the fact that my hands were shaking. “Josh?”

            “Why would you fucking do that? Why would you try to leave behind your family and love ones?” I growled out at Harry, surprising everyone and Harry was staring at me. “Suicide is for bloody cowards, who are dumb and act selfishly, they never think about other people.”

            “Josh, what the hell is wrong with you? Are you crying?” Niall asked me, staring wide eyed at me as I pulled my wallet out and threw something into the middle of the circle, a well folded piece of paper. Niall unfolded the paper, pulling it into his face as he read it out loud:

‘Dear Joshy,

            You’re going to hate me at the end of this letter, I just know it. I wasn’t sure of how to start this: how do you tell the person you love the most in the world that you are going to kill yourself? Yes, Josh, you read that right. I am committing suicide and you cannot stop me, not this time anyway. I’m just so tired of being sad, of being depressed, of cutting myself, of burning myself.

            I’m in love with you, Joshy. That reason alone is why I am killing myself. I love you so much, that is makes my body ache, especially when you do something adorable (like crinkling your nose when you find something gross). I know you hate suicide, I know you think it’s a coward’s way out but I know you’ll never love me back. How could you?