To All The Guys I Flirted

(4)

December 16, 2021

I don't kung anong pumasok sa kokote ko at nag-agree akong makipag-meet sa hindi ko masyadong kilala but one thing for sure gusto Kong magka-experience, without the sex of course just make-out, foreplay and dry humping which I'm dying to experience all. This is my fourth time meeting with a stranger and I could say I'm a bit confident in dealing with them na, learning and unlearning how to talk, touch, and play dirty or clean with them. There are new lessons I have gained wisdom for myself to not entertain vc sex because it just feels unnatural and torture. I prefer meet up char! Hahaha. Gosh I'm bored. Doing scary stuff for excitement is just a good pleasure that my mind gets, like the time I jump off from the window of my house on the second floor, if I could do that again I would have done it, riding a roller coaster, and so on. I wanna do this because I don't know if I'm capable of marrying or even make children in the future. No regrets on what I will do knowing I tried the most unusual crazy experiences.

I don't know if the guy I'm meeting would be handsome or average. I'm praying he smells good and taste good hahaha harot much. I enjoyed and have been patient during my teenage years, just by watching K-drama, anime, hanging out with my best friends, serving God and crushes were enough for me, no heartbreak just pure bliss.

Now that I'm 20 years old I wanna do something new, fun, risky and exciting. I just finished confessing my fondness to my crush last year and it was definitely a relief, to have something inside be brought and shared to the light and to that I'm happy, even though we almost flirted, it still backfired hahaha. I moved on from my old crush knowing finally I can mingle with men and have a date with each of them individually. I also keep in touch with Bien, his a bit autistic and his like the perfect guy friend to chat with. I am slowly overcoming my fear of approaching men. I can do this! Yo mama didn't raise such a puss!

Hopefully meeting this fourth guy Hindi na ko mabitin hahaha, and his name is Ken.

4:59 pm update

He was comfortable and uncomfortable to be with. Hindi gwapo taena halatang matanda na. Sabi niya 25 years old na siya pero mukhang 35 years old na. Hindi ko siya crush, the heck I don't like him at all. Next time ayokong pumapotol or makipaglandian sa mas matanda sakin medyo nandidiri or naiilang ako, personal preference ko lang.

I mentioned he was comfortable yes lalo na nung kayakap ko siya, uncomfortable kasi hindi siya gwapo at yung amoy niya hindi ko bet. 1 point sa kaniya kasi hindi niya ko binitin ng kainin niya ko pero no sex syempre. -10 points nga lang kase maliit ang tite hahaha na turn off ako for the last time. Again this is just my personal preference.

Kahit kinakain niya ko hindi ako makatingin sa kaniya shutaaa iba iniisip ko. 😅