Hi, hello! You might hate me because this is a long one and I get really depressing.I'm alive btw. I've had covid twice and still lived! You can't get rid of me!! Hahahaha!
No editing happened here because it's 1am and I don't care.
Big trigger warning as I talk about decreasing mental health and many other things.
Anyway, the point of this update update is, that the's a rewrite is in progress as is the oneshot book and a few other things I'm working on but I needed to address something here.
This book, honestly, is absolutely awful. Unless you like it then, it's great and you're a great person.
But despite its flaws, I'M NOT DELETING THIS BOOK! You might have wanted me to but I'm not. I've been looking back in this for a while now and wondering what happened and why it became such a mess. The answer is clear, and looking now it was so clear.
I wrote this book during some of the worst times for my mental health and this book was my way to get my feelings and my issues out without burdening any people in real life, you all supported me and somewhat made me feel normal. Which is bad but like I appreciated you all saying it's good when it's really not.
You can literally see my mental health decline within the chapters and you can see what I felt if you read into it, and it's not good. I went through some bad times and thought it was normal and now I can see it wasn't and I revealed that to you all through this and all the other works I've made. And I'm SO SO SORRY, I'm a terrible person for this, I passed this to you all and you kinda just accepted this.
You're probably wondering, 'Red, why the fuck are you saying this?' And that's because I know I'm not the only one going through some awful times snd especially now, everyone is suffering and I want you all to know that while I don't understand on a deep level I understand what it feels like to be isolated from everyone without even realising it and this chapter is me throwing that to you so you can throw all your feelings you need to let out to me. Even if it's just 'I'm sad, I'm angry, I can't sleep.' You're valid and it's okay to say that okay?
There are some people on this app I came to know who are no longer with us because of their own mental health and I don't want anyone else to go through that. I don't think like that anymore but I still feel bad and I'm getting help so if you feel like that please get help, if you've read through this book, chances are you need help too.
My pm is open to anyone wanting to vent, even if you don't want me to reply - it's completely anonymous because I don't know you and I'm not going to tell anyone. I can even give advice, I've done a counselling course so I even know what I'm on about for once.
Apologies that this got really deep and personal. No one should suffer is what I'm trying to say and I got super off track.
But I'm not unpublishing or deleting this book because it reminds me what I've overcome, my writing in this is awful because I was at such a low point I couldn't even write correctly but now I'm a better (still not great) author who is so much more mentally stable and I'm proud of that, this rewrite is going to show that and I can't wait for you all to see the difference.
This is also a reminder that to you, I don't exist in your life and you don't know me - so I can say all this without thinking I'll upset someone and you can too, even on your own book.
Be proud of your own achievements.
Also if you're completely fine, you're probably not - this is covid times, the world is literally tearing itself apart and you're on Wattpad so like take some time to reflect and then be positive because the world may be destroying itself but there is some funny things happening like History TikTok proving the Romans existed or Markiplier playing FNAF again - or even that Ninjago is still on Netflix despite all the new stuff.
Just don't think about the fact that Babymetal may be gone forever because I'm still upset over that and there's no optimism that can make it better.Anyway, please stay alive and live a happy life, a good life even if it feels like you're falling into concrete from a really tall building - in your feelings you're a feather or Superman or Supergirl so like it's not going to hurt it's just going to take effort to get to the top.
Have a good day!
~Red~
YOU ARE READING
Twisted Fates (Ninjago Kai X Reader)
FanfictionTHERE IS A REWRITE READ THAT INSTEAD. DO NOT READ - it's awful and I was like 13 when I wrote this. Do not read especially if you know me or my sister. DO NOT READ THIS, READ MY OTHER WORKS OR THE REWRITE FOR YOUR SANITY AND MINE. I'm not good of d...